Couple months ago I met a woman who works at a dispensary I visit about once a week. We hit it off really well. Despite trying to just keep it casual sex, and that only, I ended up developing some feelings for her. She confessed the same to me. I even introduced her to my teenaged daughter, for fucks sake.

I ran into her this evening at a gas station, with another guy, who turns out to be her husband. They’ve been married five years, and have two children together, ages 4 and 2. Finding out they have kids just made me feel disgusting.

So, I told him. He didnt believe me until I described a tattoo in a somewhat intimate place on her body. I had no fucking clue she was married. I think I ruined someone’s marriage. Or at least took part in ruining one.

I feel guilty. I am sorry for what I participated in. Am I a bad person?

  • imogen_underscore [it/its, she/her]
    ·
    1 month ago

    the chorus of he/hims in this thread positively relishing the idea of this woman getting punished by her husband for her actions and not even stopping to think about the possible violent repercussions of OPs actions is honestly disturbing. people cheat for all variety of reasons. many of them, especially for women, are justified. hate when this site shows its reddit-logo roots so plainly.

    • Rojo27 [he/him]
      ·
      1 month ago

      Honestly hadn't thought of it like that. And after reading some more of details OP provided in the replies, especially the fact that she was making a big deal about him approaching, makes it seem like there was some legitimate fear on her part of some sort of reprecussion.

      I just hope others take your, and other women's, perspective on this and learn something. Admittedly I figure being honest about an affair with the person that is being cheated on seems like a good thing on the surface, but it also completely devalues the woman and the situation they may have been in prior to cheating.

      • imogen_underscore [it/its, she/her]
        ·
        1 month ago

        no justification? what about circumstances of abuse? cishet relationships are an uneven power dynamic. plenty of women out there with varying degrees of asshole husbands who they feel coerced into staying with for economic reasons or because of fear. that is how the dynamic manifests in many cases. you come across ignorant and thoughtless acting like ending a relationship is always such a simple act. this is Christian morality nonsense, non-dialectical thinking and basically doing a generalised form of victim blaming tbh. "just leave him" smh. expect a more thought out response from a woman.