I need all elections from now on to be decided by a fry cook-off like SpongeBob vs King Neptune

  • NPa [he/him]
    ·
    2 days ago

    lathe-of-heaven Survives three assassination attempts, instantly dies from working a single minimum wage shift

    • nohaybanda [he/him]
      ·
      edit-2
      2 days ago

      Bold to assume he’ll be there longer than it takes to get a couple of pictures.

      Still, comrade grease fire take my energy

      spirit-bomb

      • jack [he/him, comrade/them]
        ·
        1 day ago

        The McDonald's manager is absolutely not gonna let him leave the shift early. He has quarterly numbers to hit.

        • ICBM@lemmygrad.ml
          ·
          1 day ago

          Uhh, hey, Donnie? We're going to need you here to open on saturday too, okay, thanks. And, uh, please tuck in your shirt; I heard corporate is doing inspections this week.

          • Ildsaye [they/them]
            ·
            20 hours ago

            "My name is Dona-"
            "Cool, see you on Saturday then, Donnie"

  • D61 [any]
    ·
    2 days ago

    Presidency of the USA is now decided by who gets the high score in a competitive Burger Time marathon.

  • Weedian [he/him]
    hexagon
    ·
    2 days ago

    https://x.com/KristenhCNN/status/1846302835719471125

    Someone get him the 10 lb bag of ice

      • Hestia [comrade/them, she/her]
        ·
        2 days ago

        I have a coworker who's a little neurodivergent and had someone tell her doing this is a good way to clean out a deep fryer, without picking up on their sarcasm. Luckily they stopped her before she actually tried.

      • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
        ·
        2 days ago

        I have felt this working in every kitchen I've vmever worked at least 35 timed each

  • Wheaties [she/her]
    ·
    2 days ago

    oh wow hes gonna drop a basket and wait for the little green light

    now if he could change the oil, that would actually be impressive

    • Adkml [he/him]
      ·
      1 day ago

      I'll be impressed if he resists the urge to stick his hand in the oil to get a really fresh fry

  • M68040 [they/them]
    ·
    1 day ago

    Back when I was working at McDonald’s I had a dream where we ended up hiring him for some reason. This was shortly after the 2016 win.

  • micnd90 [he/him,any]
    ·
    2 days ago

    feast

    From the ashes a fire shall be woken

    A light from the shadow shall spring

    Renewed shall be the blade that was broken

    The crownless again shall be king

  • miz [any, any]
    ·
    edit-2
    2 days ago

    I keep insisting to my brain that this is real but so far I just can't believe it