So many party invites to juggle because I wanna go to all the things all of my partners want to go to. So many gifts to buy for really important people. So many mini gift exchanges to be scheduled. Every partner you or a partner or a meta adds makes everything infinitely more complicated.

It's both the most loving time of the year and also the most complicated part of the year.

  • GaveUp [she/her]
    ·
    20 days ago

    How much time do you spend with your partners per week? I like to spend at least 3-4 hours ~3 days a week with my partner and after my 9-5, life responsibilities, alone time, energy limits, friends, interests, I barely had time to fit in a couple casual FWBs

    • Infamousblt [any]
      hexagon
      M
      ·
      edit-2
      20 days ago

      Depends. I have a nesting partner that I spend lots of random time with because we live together and spend most nights together, but we set aside one long intentional evening a week... one partner I see twice a week one short day hang one long sleepover, and a third partner that I see whenever I can for whatever we can do...usually once every other week but sometimes more sometimes less.

      I love them all so much. If I could spend all of my time with all of them all of the time I would but schedules are what they are so we do our best.

      I'd love to have a couple of comet relationships or some casual group things but that's a next year goal, too busy right now to go seek something like that out.

      • GaveUp [she/her]
        ·
        20 days ago

        How close do you feel to that third partner? How often and long do you chat online? Probably just a me problem but if I'm not hanging out with people at least once a week or so in an intimate and close fashion (i.e. not a big group activity/party and lots of conversation) I can't feel emotionally close to them

        • Infamousblt [any]
          hexagon
          M
          ·
          20 days ago

          Very close. I wish I was closer. We're both experienced polyam though and we both have bonkers schedules so it's just an agreement that we have. It's been a very slow moving relationship because we don't spend as much time as we'd like. But we just communicate about it and we stay connected how we can. We send pictures and updates about our day and we do the best we can.

          As long as we communicate and stay in the same page it's been fine. We'll see though I have a feeling it won't be okay forever. We've only been doing this a year ish and it's been hard at times for sure.

          But when the right relationship comes into your life you make it work even if its tough.

          • GaveUp [she/her]
            ·
            20 days ago

            I hope it works out for you two long term! Sorry to hear the infrequently face to face has made it hard at times

            • Infamousblt [any]
              hexagon
              M
              ·
              20 days ago

              That's okay! I think it will, but if not I won't regret trying. Gotta take risks with your heart sometimes to get the most out of life