im not sure where else to post this. it's a bit of a vent, but I'm not gonna take too long
I've been on mastodon for 7-8 years now. mastodon has been pretty cool because unlike other social media, it allowed me to form closer ties to the people there. but this also made me realize how hurtful I can be to people who care about me
making a long story short: mastodon gave me a sense of security about expressing myself, so I went all out. just said whatever came to mind, responded to people honestly, etc. most of the time I always try not to insult anyone, especially when replying to people I care about. one friend made me realize I was being too combative for no reason sometimes and then I decided to take things easier
still, that didn't prevent me from hurting people I care about, which led me to be blocked by people I interacted a lot and who I considered to be friends a few times. one of those times, I was soft-blocked and saw the guy subtoot about me, so I knew what it was about and had the chance to reach out and apologize. he accepted my apologies, but said I sometimes come across as needlessly aggressive, which, according to him, contradicts what people who know me personally say about me. the other times I wasn't so lucky, so I just got blocked and have no idea why
all this reminds me of my childhood, when people constantly told me I'm annoying and that I should be quiet, which probably rendered me into a very quiet and shy teenager. I remember taking the piss out of people and enjoying it, so maybe people are right
not sure what to think of it. in the flesh world, people around me say I'm one of the nicest people they know, that I'm very caring and kind. some people say that about me on mastodon too, but I wonder if it's all just a mask and the true me is the annoying kid I suppressed early in my life.
Well some people go their entire lives without doing this sort of critical introspection, so good on you!
Is that real? How do they manage it? Why aren't they curious about their effect on other people? For years and years they never ask questions about what's going on?
Absolutely. I didn't realize how bad it was until I had some content get out of my niche and got thousands of comments on a video. People are incredibly confident in their own opinions and refuse to investigate or think twice about anything. They'll make the same comment as hundreds of other people, asking the same question that's already answered in the description. I don't know how they do it, but people legitimately say whatever comes to mind and then never ever think about it again
There are millions of assholes out there who think they’ve been right about everything they’ve ever said and done
And they beat down enough people around them to the point that they just capitulate and enable them.
Entitlement and a victim complex mostly, which goes hand in hand.
For most of those people, they think things just happen to them unfairly, and without any input on their part
"Everyone else is wrong!" is the mindset.
I'm not sure I understand exactly what you mean, but my post isn't me saying "oh shit, I'm an inconsiderate asshole". it's more like "oh shit, even though I try to be kind to people I somehow end up hurting them in ways I don't understand whenever I feel comfortable with myself"