My dog would immediately deport all mailmen regardless of nationality. She deems them to be an existential threat.

  • kittin [he/him]
    ·
    edit-2
    6 hours ago

    Immediate death to all vacuum cleaners and the humans must be on the couch at all times except when I want to be alone.

    The food bowl cannot be empty. The other cat cannot eat from the food bowl.

    The other cat must die.

    The other cat must clean my ears.

    The other cat must warm me when I’m cold.