wow! the general, from the car insurance ads, is running for president!!!
BAR RESCUE: WHITE HOUSE EDITION
Narrator: This bar has been run down for the last several decades, with each previous owner taking more and more from the till, and giving nothing back. Can Jon and his team save this establishment from ultimate collapse?
Taffer: "I'm gonna give you two new liquor wells, an upgraded soda gun, and lifetime subscription to Par Tender
Drink Specialist Mia Mastroianni: "I've got the perfect custom cocktail to spice things up around here! We're gonna call it The Cumtown Special and I can't tell you all the ingredients, but it does contain the tears of bald eagles, and a sprinkling of depleted uranium on top!"
This is fucking dumb i'm just gonna stop.
an upgraded soda gun
Oh god, oh fuck, don't upgrade the CIA soda gun