OK who tf is going around photoshopping Dutch Google translate results
"Sloemmed" "peanus" and "keur" aren't real words
"Ik sloeg de autodeur dicht op mijn penis" is an accurate translation
It's owo-ified, and fake informal text before even that effect. Without the owoification:
whoops! The train is defective! We are working very hard to fix this. You might be better off cycling.
Obviously too informal to be a real.message (plus you can tell it's shopped)
But here's a translation including owo stuff
"Oopsie doopsie! The train is bwokie dwokie! We're wurking vewy hawd to make it work. mby you could go bwicycling instead owo"
Like... ALL the way up your penis? Am I on the weird part of the internet again?
op = on , no one's able to fit a car door in their urethra but maybe you'll get a Guinness World Record so try it
its transphobic to not slam your penis in a car door, get to work cissies.