Like even within long term waiting there are huge differences with what I do depending on exactly how much time I have.
Actually the worst thing is when you enter short term waiting mode only for it to take an hour so you're just stuck in short term waiting mode for an hour.
wouldn't it be better to always switch to long-term mode, or is it a matter of switching costs
Problem is that in this case you dont KNOW when the thing is going to happen, and if you go into long term mode then when the thing you're waiting for comes along you're not going to be ready for it because you're now asorbed into the thing you chose to do for long term waiting mode. Short term waiting mode means you're ready to pop off and go when it comes. But if you had known it would take an hour from the beginning youd have gone about things totally different.
What an autistic person means
My guy, this isn't just autistic people. This is basically everyone. Efficient queuing systems will theoretically tell you time-in-line to permit you to do things like come back later or take a shit, firm in the conviction that you won't miss your turn in line.
I'm so tired of this interaction
ND person: Expresses how neurodivergence effects them in a way others end up finding relatable Someone else: actually thats everyone :)
Yes some ND experiences can be universalized to an extent but its the acute, specific and overwhelming way that effects us that is the point (also, in this post, the way NT people react to the question is also key).
Yes some ND experiences can be universalized to an extent but its the acute, specific and overwhelming way that effects us that is the point
I'm trying to express that a well-organized and well-run bureaucracy benefits everyone. In the same way that, say, wheelchair ramps benefit more people than just those in wheelchairs and flashing alarms benefit more than just deaf people, a queue system that gives you some idea of time-to-turn benefits more than just people with acute autism.
The ask that autistic people make is only necessary because the logistical infrastructure that should be a default expectation across bureaucratic systems isn't built out or maintained. And the reason for that kind of cheapo/lazy deployment of infrastructure stems from a deliberate impermanence that everyone is expected to endure in a socio-economic system that hates durable public institutions.
Ah yeah, I get what you were going for then. That makes sense. Thanks.
It's not far off from this too-common interaction.
Person with clinical depression: has clinical depression.
Abrasive neurotypical person: "Everyone gets sad sometimes! Just touch grass and find a way to be less sad!"
EDIT: The followup reply is I suppose better though.
Ya, I think this is just a mutual respect thing, and not providing good faith estimates or getting upset about it is some shitty power play behavior.
I really hate how many 'adults' are so consumed by individualist competitive ideology that trying to coordinate logistics becomes some emotional warfare BS.
ADHD folks too. Let me know if I have time to context switch out of waiting and into something else. I can context switch back quickly but I can't sit here wondering if I should or shouldn't
I've found more people tend to be chill if you explain it like; "I don't mind, I just need to know. Because I have other things I can do if it's going to be a while."
Ive had people even get mad at that but i guess those people were just dicks.
yeah that's just unreasonable it's a common question people are busy and you might have places to be
Just asking ETA on everything is normal, especially if it's like a service that you're getting.
If someone says "gimme a minute" assume they mean 10 then ask ETA after that.
y'all have a second distinct waiting mode? i just do short-term but waste more time