Decimalization is a plague wrought upon our society by bourgeois liberals, while traditional units of measurement were refined over thousands of years by the proletariat through practical use to be applicable to the real world.

Consider money. You have a mutual aid program with one thousand dollars that it needs to give to three equally-needy people. How the fuck are you going to give each of them $333.33 repeating money? Absolute bullshit.

The old money system was far more rational. Two-hundred forty pennies to a dollar was a pretty common way to break it up. That breakup allowed each dollar to be split evenly among 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 8, 10, 12, 15, 16, 20, 24, 30, 40, 48, 60, 80, 120, and 240 of your fellow workers. Compare that to the modern, decimalized dollar, which can only be split evenly between 2, 4, 5, 10, 20, 25, 50, and 100 of your fellow proletarians.

It's not just money that suffers from decimalization though, it's damn-near everything. What the fuck is 30 centimeters? Oh, it's about as long as a foot. Why not just use a foot? Do you know how long a foot is? It's about as long as A FUCKING FOOT! HOW MUCH IS 235 MILLILITERS? IT'S ABOUT AS LARGE AS A CUP! ISN'T OUR SYSTEM IS SO MUCH MORE LOGICAL THAN THE OLD SYSTEM OF A CUP BEING ABOUT AS LARGE AS A CUP!

You might be thinking "oh you're just a dumb provincial American, get used to the metric system and it isn't so bad." Motherfucker the beautiful thing about the old measurement system is that you never have to "get used" to fucking anything, because the measurements are based on practical shit. The only practical measurement in the whole fucking metric system is the liter, and that's because they made it almost indistinguishable from a quart.

BuT hOw MaNy QuArTs ArE iN a GaLlOn? Listen here you common core chucklefuck. Saying that it's easier to remember metric because it's all in tens or hundreds or whatever is just pasting a bandaid over the problem, which is that our education system has had all practical skills systematically rooted out of it. I remember taking Home Ec when I was in middle school and I damn well learned what all of the common measurements were by applying them to real life shit. This metric bullshit is designed to be easier to memorize when you read about it in a textbook.

Who would design this disaster? The French took a break from their rampant Islamophobia and Antisemitism to create this bullshit. But it wasn't the French people, who continued to use traditional units of measure until the new systems were forced upon them, it was the post-revolutionary Bourgeoisie, who had never cut wood or measured flour in their fucking lives, who said "hon hon, let us introduce a new measurement system, oi oi" and infected the world with this plague.

Metric is idealistic nonsense imposed by rich assholes that is increasingly being favored over the materialist, proletarian traditional measurements. The only reason it has any continuing cultural purchase at all is because PMC dipshits like to lord how much smarter they are over everyone. Look inside yourself and destroy any vestige of a hold the metric system has on you, just as through self reflection you should seek to destroy all other forms of liberalism.

  • FunnyUsername [she/her]
    ·
    4 years ago

    I thought the title was Decriminalization is a Plague and I was super confused