-What do you think about the pet/parent analogies? Are you a dog mom? A cat dad? A platypus owned by a dirty owl? What’s your take?
spoiler
I fucking cringe when I’m referred to as my cat or dog’s “Dad”? Are you inferring that someone in my near family fucks animals? Or that I fuck animals? If I have to take a title, as per my relationship with my animals, it’d be “Custodial Thumb Haver”. I love them deeply and genuinely feel lucky to have them. But they aren’t my kids. Because I don’t have kids. We have a mutually beneficial and emotional relationships. I didn’t have to fuck a cat or dog to have that.
They didn't really evolve to do anything. We bred wolves for those traits that made them act like that. More specifically we bread them to to maintain their juvenile mentality for longer periods of time. A juvenile wolf acts very similar to a dog. Up until like 2ish years old when a wolf becomes and adult. Then they become much more aggressive and "wild." We just kept lengthening this stage more and more till we basically bread it out all together. So the first true domesticated "dog" is basically a wolf stuck in "kid mode."
Edit cause I'm too lazy to respond to ppl: I did not say "All dogs traits are due to wolves being bred to be permanent kids." But the first step in turning wolves in to domesticated dogs was reducing their aggression. Turns out adolescent wolves (up to about 2 years old) are FAR less aggressive and very "dog like" in nature up until they become adult wolves. Adolescent wolves are easier to train, like to play, bark and general "be kids." Adult wolves not so much (at least not with humans unless you are that dude that loves with them). It is theorized the first step we took in domesticating dogs was breeding for a kind of "permanent adolescence" that lengthened this stage upon which wolves were friendlier and more easy to train. Sure we bred other traits we found favorable but to say say doges "evolved to hijack or brains" is just silly. I also said the "first true domesticated dogs." Not dogs as they are. The first dogs were tools. Humans realized we could use wolves to aid in hunting and that's what they were for. Then as time progresses we bred them for a great number of other tasks. So we selectively bred them to be whatever we needed them to be. All bringing to bear a number of other physical and mental changes unique to the task it was meant for. In some cases we bred them to be every sillier and more playful. In other we bred them to be even more aggressive. To the point that they will fight off bears and can even down actual wolves in 1v1. The wolf didn't choose to be this way. They didn't breed themselves to fit our designed. We said which wolf could mate based on their traits. They even killed or ran off the ones that got too aggressive or were untrainable. It's "selective breeding" it is a form of evolution sure but they were still bred based on OUR design. Not a natural evolution.
That's not really how it went. First we started working with wolves to hunt and share the food. That only worked because the wolves were willing to work with us.
Then we started to have them live with us to have a reliable hunting partner rather than incidental cooperation, and again that worked because there were wolves willing to live with us the first place. Those had to naturally evolve before we could have a chance to "artificially" select traits.
Then we bred them more to do more specific hunting (dachshunds to catch badgers, bird dogs to retrieve birds, etc) and for other jobs (like St Bernards). All the while they were "hijacking our child caring neurons" which is why we also ended up breeding them to be cute and "kid mode".
Calling your pet your son or daughter seems like such a 2015 thing, but instead of stopping, I think you should just take it a step weirder. Call them your actual human son, or a fruit of your loin, or something else gross like that.
I always say I'm my cat's mentor. I taught him the basics of CQC.
It's pretty fucking condescend when The Boss says that. Like, remember the basics of this combat style you co-develloped
If she hadn't said that he would have walked up to the first guard and gave him a big old hug
It really started with soundwave. Like he's the coolguy in the evil empire who's always pregnant, but the babies are his friendpets who help him out. It's the best americans can aspire to. Everybody wants the babies, they just don't want human babies. I mean soundwave didn't pop out little versions of himself and if he did it would've been stupid. In the technohell future where you can give birth to anything that dog will be your actual child, he will live in your ribcage.
I mean, Frenzy and Rumble were kind of like little versions of Soundwave.
lmao at the "ppl be fuckin' cats and dogs" bit.
anyway, pets are adoptive dependents. there's no bestiality in the mix.
Are you inferring that someone in my near family fucks animals? Or that I fuck animals?
:expert-shapiro:
"Dad" doesn't mean biological parent, so no animal fucking is needed. You serve the same function to it as you would to a young child of yours. And it even serves a similar function to you as a child would.
