This is a real question I really like the fantasy setting even the world building but for love of all that is holy why I can I not find anything that isn't horny and gross, I just have fond memory of playing online fantasy games with friends, I feel like i'm losing my mind Is it so much to ask for a good story maybe even romance and but with no silly male power fantasy/ fanservice? :inshallah: I will take any suggestions that meet the non horny/ no useless female characters/ shitty male characters I feel like I'm asking for too much.
Magical Knight Rayearth and Escaflowne. They were written for a young girl demographic, so they avoid the grosser sex tropes and focus more on feelings and more developed characters. EDIT: I would also add Record of Lodoss and Slayers, although they're not really isekai
What if D&D but Anime? A bit choppy in the delivery, but overall a great show.
If you like that series, check out The Black Moon Chronicles comic. Very similar style and mood.
Slayers isn't Isekai, but it's basically a spiritual predecessor to Konosuba (with maybe 10% of the latter's problematic stuff)