https://twitter.com/mothercroft/status/1758050442175553796
"sup, bitches! Today we're gonna do a tutorial on how to apply your contouring to pop even with drab dungeon lighting."
It's like a mine craft water bucket. Just use it to break your fall when you fail a climbing QTE.
a grown ass man, painstakingly applying makeup to the face of a character from an children’s game, to own the libs
I physically cannot play video games without an erection.
what happens to a mf if they never seen a woman other than their mom
My mom doesn't have curves therefore no woman does.
Supposedly straight men who have very complex opinions on what makeup fictional women should wear
Some [women] have tried to become semi-men by putting on the Bloomer dress. Let me tell you in a word why it can never be done. It is this: woman, robed and folded in her long dress, is beautiful. She walks gracefully.... If she attempts to run, the charm is gone.... Take off the robes, and put on pants, and show the libs, and grace and mystery are all gone. Even Venus never tried to run. Et vera incessu patuit Dea. So long as she is thus clothed, there is just enough of mystery about woman to challenge admiration, and almost reverence.
excerpt from Women's Rights, by Reverend John Todd (1867)
the very old and storied cry of Women have to dress and behave different or else I might notice they're not particularly different from men, and that makes me very uncomfortable for reasons. Legitimate reasons!
dammit, that should have bin "limbs"
i typed the first half by hand, copying it out of People's History of the United States then found the rest of the passage online
If Tomb Raider Underworld was released right now there'd be talking heads bitching about Lara in that too.
They kept the impractical outfit and she's still conventionally attractive and it's still not good enough for them.
Why try to please gamers?
the impractical outfit
doesn't she do a bunch of rock climbing and gymnastics?
I just meant if I was in the jungle, I wouldn't want a tick on my leg or whatever.
the trouble with coming up with appropriate dress for her is that she's doing several tasks that have conflicting needs.
really she should wear those cargo pants that unzip at the knee and switch when she needs to parkour
Lara Croft is a simplistic video game character from the 90s intended to be a) cool and b) hot. Considering the practicality of her classic costume is like asking why Duke Nukem only ever wears jeans and a tanktop despite his primary occupation being getting into gunfights with aliens
I think it's just easy to run into tonal issues when you try to add depth to such a 1-dimensional character
pretty sure she has makeup on in the first pic, but it just AINT ENOUGH
She's glaring at the camera while brandishing a weapon. That's what this guy has a problem with -- he'd rather she have a, a what? A neutral expression? An attempt at seduction? Sultry? Is 'sultry' the only expression allowed on the face of a female character? Some reverse angry-eyes-american-kirby bullshit.
I mean, if you really wanted this to feel more like classic 90s Lara Croft you'd give her the red sunglasses and have her smirk at the camera instead of this AI yassification filter shit. These cumbrained morons are completely focused on the aspect but they forget that old Lara was also a cartoonishly over the top badass in the vein of Duke Nukem or Serious Sam crossed with James Bond
I would honestly enjoy it if they leaned more into that inherent silliness of her character instead of trying to turn her into a sympathetic gritty action hero who wants to make her dad proud or whatever because Lara Croft has to also be a role model. Her series is called TOMB RAIDER, she's a rich asshole that loots priceless treasures
also the slaughter of endangered animals with reckless abandon. Laura is like an epicurean who doesn't bother with the meal.
She does have compunction about killing people. She gets over it at the end of the first game.
Lara Croft sees a Tyrannosaurus Rex that somehow survived to modern day and the only thing she thinks of is how cool its head would look mounted above her fireplace
as long as she keeps that breathy english accent i can make fun of i don't give a shit what she looks like
WE'VE GOT TO FIND THE TREASURE, JONAH!
Considering how dirty and sweaty the rest of her body/clothes looks its interesting that he thinks her make up would still look that nice. But suspension of disbelief or whatever
A girl should never leave home without her Covid-19 rated transparent plastic face shield.
It's a good thing Adam Forest didn't have blue hair on top of that. He would've had no way of recovering if Harry did the "blue hair and pronouns" ultra-combo roast on him.