active networking is the 10th circle of hell,never in my life have I felt so actively disgusted with myself in a social context. how do you do this without the urge to partiotism or how do you tamp down that urge because oh my god I cannot stomach it, it feels so fucking slimy to do. i can't even do it at events where the sole purpose is networking, my dad pressed me into one and I bailed 15 minutes in after hovering around, it feels so utterly degrading and gross

  • footfaults [none/use name]
    ·
    9 months ago

    I did some "networking" meetup groups back in the day around software development and they were okay, it helps that most of the people like software and it's cool to hang out and talk shop sometimes.

    The key was that all of us already had jobs in the industry so it was more of a "want to hang out and learn some stuff" kind of thing.

    I'm not sure about the context around your networking event you went to. Was it to find a job?

    • Pluto [he/him, he/him]
      ·
      9 months ago

      Events like that are fine.

      To get a job?

      Idk, it just seems... kinda fake? Like, your actual friendship has no intrinsic value other than to get a job?

      • OgdenTO [he/him]
        ·
        9 months ago

        Capitalism, something something transform social relationships something about transactional or whatever

      • footfaults [none/use name]
        ·
        9 months ago

        I don't have any good advice. I just remember older mentors saying "oh just keep trying" and feeling so frustrated. Like, I'm now on the other side and I don't have much to offer besides I've been there and felt that way. It sucks, and it might feel like it'll never happen for you, Just keep trying.