if you call everyone dude and a transfem person gets mad about it, don't get defensive. just say like "sorry, i won't do it again" and don't argue "actually it's gender neutral" or "i call everyone dude". even if you do, i guarantee she's heard that argument from someone who very much does not call people they see as women dude. i certainly have
same goes double for the word guy.
From what I recall, referring to a group of people as “you guys” is a regional thing. I remember in that NY times dialect test that it was one of the questions that nailed me. That said, if I’m referring to group solely of women, it does seem odd, so I usually use party people or peeps in this situation. Using folks or y’all would get weird looks here.
makes sense. i think i say it because i'm originally from the more northern part of the mid atlantic and picked it up younger