Every now and then I see the topic arrise on tiktok or reddit and the comments will contain armies of people who say shit like "how am i supposed to wash my ass this is simply TOO COMPLICATED for me to understand" like apply to soap to asshole is a complex science.
Then followed by the same batshit justifications like "well i dont eat with my ass" like those same people will happily have shit smeared on any other non eating part of their body.
Anyway i bullied my friends into ass washing, wash your ass. In communism yurt owlssr you will be shot if you dont.
Edit: I love how we can have struggle sessions about the most inane things. Anyway keep your asses indoors, outdoor asses harm the wildlife
I only learned that some dudes don't wipe their ass after 'fellas is it gay to wipe' became a meme. I had no idea it was a thing until then, I just assumed that everyone old enough to be out of diapers wiped.
It still blows my mind that anyone could walk around with shit stuck to their ass and not be bothered.
You know you're gross when an owl covered in dirt thinks your hygiene sucks.
CW: Revolting
spoiler
My ex's ex used to call the bits that clung to his butt beard "klingons"
:what-the-hell:
In German they are known as klabuster bears
Edit: I have no idea what a klabuster is. I don't think it's a word that exists outside of this context.
Can't touch butt, butt is gay. Do not want to catch gay.
(also, wash your fucking hands)
Sometimes, but depends on what I'm doing haha. idk, people are filthy.
Once I got a bidet I feel unclean whenever I use any other toilet
OOC, is the risk of pooping on the bidet high? How forceful is the jet?
Depends on your water pressure, but pretty fucking forceful. Turning the knob to max would shred my asshole. And never pooped on it, the physics and angles involved seem to prevent it
just fyi i am completely useless and i managed to install mine in about 15 minutes or so
(also some have settings for "feminine wash" so if you have a vagina you may wanna spring for that)
The cold water is surprising at first, but you get used to it after a few times. Or at least, I did.
After the revolution, everyone will not only be forced to wash their ass, but will have both mandatory squat sets to make their asses bigger.
You will own a dumptruck and you will be happy.
Apparently OP is onto something. Ass washing is controversial apparently
How do you dry your ass at the end without toilet paper?
how the hell you clean those rags id never stick a rag with shit on it in the washer thats asking for trouble
there isnt shit on the rag, the shit was already washed off. the rag is just for drying
:doubt: bidets def dont get everything off even with a proper hosing down tho
maybe my butthole just has too much unibrow
i actually have a nutritionally complete diet that is largely vegan :very-smart: i actually have everything tallied out because im fine with eating the same shit forever so long as i can make it in bulk
just built different
It's a combo of timing and/or preparation, I used to fast and use an enema just to be sure.
Lots of fiber keeps the bottom's ass clean. Good for saving on toilet paper too
A condom does wonders. Kinda like a bag you bring when you take your dog for a walk.
Meat and dairy turns your arse into mud chute. So cutting that out helps.
As a dude with IBS I can't afford to not scrub my ass. I don't know how people ignore it even if they don't have an issue. Especially if you have a detachable shower head.
ngl, the wierd pseudo-fetishism for bidets on this website kinda weirds me out
you know you can just wipe well right?
you don't need a specialised gadget to clean your anus properlyno, you're weird for not joining the cult. your wipes are specialized gadgets they're just normative to you so you don't consider them to be.
bidets are the next step in the historical material process of ass cleaning. live in ass feudalism if you like, but don't get jealous when ass communism happens and you aren't invited because youve left your ass in the dark ages
my backside is "the fun zone"
i keep it very clean for the people who would like to avail themselves of it's services :bottom-speak:
yankee
Says the weirdo freaking the fuck out defending toilet paper, a very anglo commodity
homie i wash my ass with a 97 cent bottle. that I fill with water over and over again. that's less than TP.
A bidet can be bought for less than a single pack of toilet paper, and it isn't a single use item. Squeeze bidets are like a $5 commodity, sprayer styles are in the $10-15 range, and seat style ones are around $20.
As far as I can tell, a small package of store brand tp in the US is around $8, and a large one is around $20.
Bidets get the job done faster and better, and if you go for a basic mechanical one without any of the bells and whistles it only costs about $25
If you got shit on your hand would you wipe it off with paper and call it clean? No you fucking wouldn't don't even lie. Stop being ridiculous and wash your ass
You're doing the equivalent of seeing "Using soap is good because it smells nice and reduces the risk of disease" and rather than responding with "everybody should be able to have soap" you say "not everybody can afford soap, so soap is a frivolous bourgeoise luxury that should not exist"
Can you explain what you're trying to say then, because I'm not sure how else to interpret your comments
I think it's an obsession born out of the experience of eating a low fiber diet, and having heinous sticky 💩
