Every discussion we have spawns more discussions so here we go again.

I'm gay and extremely active in the queer community with a lot of friends in activist circles who are trans, genderqueer, bi, pan, and so on. Literally until Femboy Hooters I'd never even come across the term. Here's what I think I see and y'all tell me if I'm off.

Femboys themselves seem to mostly be gay boys, although some are potentially trans eggs waiting to crack, but largely they seem to be comfortable with being gay and cis and male. They all seem to dress up pretty hardcore in feminine clothes and wear make up, but they're not drag queens or genderqueer, or they don't identify as such at least.

What's weird to me (yet still makes sense) is that the vast majority of people attracted to them are straight guys. As one dude said, "Men make better women." So of course there's the overtone of misogyny there. I've been approached before by straight men asking me if I'd be willing to wear panties or take hormones or get a tit job, but I hadn't really thought about it until I saw the preponderance of femboys out there in the world. Now how can I say these guys are straight if they want to fuck a cis man? Pretty simple, they don't see me as one. They see me as a woman who they want to feminize more.

I tried looking at the etymology and history of the term but there's nothing much. I did uncover a trove of femboys who hate trans people and who also differentiate themselves from what they call tr^ps. If you hate trans people your gay card should get revoked automatically so fuck them, but it seems to confirm my suspicion that this seems to have a misogynist bent to it. This may just be a label for the types of gay guys I knew who were very feminine and liked to date straight men, who treated them like garbage and both of them had really conservative personal politics.

But I don't know and I want to learn so tell me what's up, I'm old and I need my porridge.

  • BASED_BALL [none/use name]
    ·
    4 years ago

    femboy was its own thing for a long time, i spent a long time on the chans and met men who want to take estrogen but also want to stay men

    • gayhobbes [he/him]
      hexagon
      ·
      4 years ago

      Is it a chan thing? Because if it is it makes a lot more sense, it's not something I've ever really run into in queer circles. But I don't know that for certain.

      • Parzivus [any]
        ·
        4 years ago

        Used to be but not really anymore - hence the femboy hooters and whatnot

    • lvysaur [he/him]
      ·
      4 years ago

      met men who want to take estrogen but also want to stay men

      What exactly do you mean by "stay men"? Are you referring to their self-identification or the surgical vaginoplasty procedure?

      Because I've seen a lot of 4channers bizarrely obsessed with "not getting a penile-to-vagina surgery" or something. I'