It sounds extremely corny and melodramatic but he's my oldest friend and I can't bare to see him like this. He can barely walk to the litterbox anymore and he doesn't eat. I spent about an hour just weaping after I made the appointment. The vet is coming to my home to do it there, I don't want to bring him to a strange and stressful environment for his final moments. I am not joking when I say that I love this cat more than almost anyone in my life. I spent so much of my life alone but he was always there and ready to comfort me, and when I was recovering from surgery he was the only thing keeping me company. As he's got older I've reminded myself to cherish every moment we have left but now that we've reached the end of our time together I'm just so damn distraught. My other cat was an outdoor cat (we adopted a stray we were feeding and she hated our indoor cat, don't start this struggle session right now) and I didn't get to be with her when she died, our neighbor found her in his yard. I had imagined that she'd come back and pass away in the shelter we built here where she slept every night, but no. I feel like I really missed something because I wasn't there when she died, and I don't want that with this cat. Idk how I can do anything between now and then, it's all I'm thinking about. Alright I think I'm gonna cry again for a bit and look at pictures of him.
You will never know how much it means to them that you have been someone they can count on during their brief stay in this chaotic and confusing world we all live in.
The same can be said for your decisions to be there for them in their final moments and to have those moments be in their home.
It’s going to hurt a lot, but that’s because you have a heart. You’re stronger for that, even when you feel like a blubbering mess. I’m not saying you’re stronger for the adversity, I’m saying you’re strong enough to care. It takes heart to care that much for these sweet little creatures that are simultaneously real and irreplaceable members of the family and also completely replaceable and not unique.
What I’m saying is that plenty of people would rather isolate or kill that part of themselves that cares so profoundly for the sweet little critters of the world. They mistake that for weakness because it can absolutely feel that way in the moment, but it is the opposite. Some people are unlucky enough to never develop that profound capacity to truly love something other than yourself.
“ At the risk of seeming ridiculous, let me say that the true revolutionary is guided by a great feeling of love. It is impossible to think of a genuine revolutionary lacking this quality.“ -Che
Don’t run from it, don’t be afraid. You’re doing the right thing, which almost always sucks. Kitty loves you so much and will be very grateful you were there right up to the end. And the end is never really the end. Nothing is ever truly created or destroyed. Every single particle of every whisker and claw will be recycled into something new.
And you’ll always have the memories of the love you shared. And you will come out the other side. Every peak eventually declines and every valley has a bottom. You will feel better again and that’s what kitty would want for you.
And hey hopefully someday you feel up to being another kitties forever home. That’s a question for another day. For now just remember remember that hurting like this is an inseparable part of loving so much. You cannot escape one without surrendering the other.
Lord knows a lot of cats need homes and the biosphere appreciates every one of the little maniacs that we can contain in our homes. Not to say there’s anything wrong with taking care of outdoor kitties too.
You are an awesome person for caring so much. Let yourself grieve and trust that you will come out the other side. Your kitty was very lucky to have found you and hopefully someday maybe another kitty will be too.
Cats do have a habit of just going off somewhere to die, it's kinda crazy. My gfs cat she had when she was a kid did that.
I have 3 cats, had 1 growing up but he had to live with my aunt and died with her. Ive never put a pet down. I'm gonna be a fucking wreck when the time comes. I'll straight up say a family member died just so i can get off work.
Death always sucks, im sorry youre hurting. Just comfort him all you can and know that you're making the best decision for his quality of life. I've had to watch family members die slowly and i wish i could have euthanized them.
Cats do have a habit of just going off somewhere to die
This worries me a little bit because he's been crawling under the blankets on my bed. He basically lives on my bed because it's so hard for him to walk, but he doesn't want to go anywhere else. The only movement he really does is going under the covers so I'm worried that he's planning to die down there. My first indoor cat started exploring little hiding areas in the house when he got ill and basically picked a death place the way mother cats make a secluded breeding area. I just hope my cat doesn't crawl under my sheets and die there before Tuesday. That would be the most horrible surprise imaginable.
It's a place that smells like you and is comfortable and warm. You're in a time of great pain, but perhaps you can take comfort in the knowledge your cat wants to be near you instead of hiding away.
my house has a cantilever floor on it. so the dining room has this area that hangs off the side of my house. i was getting people to insulate the floor cause it was letting mass cold air in my basement.
they wanted me to remove the old insulation that was up there. i pulled out some of the insulation, saw a skeleton, freaked out. I had the insulation guys remove it, but i think it pretty much had to be a cat that went up there to die. it seemed the right size. Theres no entry from the outside. At some point, someones cat just went off to die, there was a smell and then the smell went away and they maybe never knew what the fuck happened. im still creeped out by it. Luckily most houses dont have this setup and we have a basement ceiling anyways now. I think it went up there before there was a ceiling. my cat tried to get up there too but the ceiling mostly stopped him.
i wish i had something better to say, just remember the good times. Sometimes people clip a little fur to keep. im very sad for you now.
shit sucks. I’ve tried to sit near my ill kitty every evening, and pet her, and comfort her
Time heals all, friend.
I did this. Literally this, about two weeks ago. Almost the same exact situation as you. My cat was closer to me than most of my family. Feel free to dm me if you want to chat about it. I feel comfortable sharing I just don't want to post too many details.
Being with him at the end was really nice (we were able to schedule but had it performed at the hospital). I was an absolute wreck. I do not know if I could have done it without my wife. I was fortunate to be able to take the next day off of work.
After we got home my wife and I stayed up late drinking and smoking swapping stories about him. We made a small memorial in our living room for him with a couple big pictures and some candles. Highly recommend as it gives a nice place to go and relax when you miss them.
Two weeks later and I still cry randomly sometimes but it's happening way less. Looking back, we are glad to have given him a great life.
I'm feeling for you friend. Better days are ahead, I promise. This is for the best and you are a terrific person for bearing this pain to bring peace to your furry comrade.
So sorry to hear. Our animal pals are our closest even if we don't know it. Gonna gon snuggle my kitty now.
:meow-hug:
I'm very, very sorry for your situation. Just try to cherish these last days/nights with him.
It's very kind of you that you're doing it in the home, he'll appreciate that.
You're doing him a favour. I will always regret not putting my cat down and letting him die while in a coma.
Letting go is always the most difficult thing... That pain will inevitably ease over time, everybody processes these events differently but that's what I remind myself.
I'm sorry friend. I wish I could like give you a hug or a better outlet to let it out. I'm here for you as much as a stranger on the internet can be.
It happens but at the very least you're giving him a comfortable way to leave. You might end up feeling guilty but you really shouldn't. You did your best and your cat loves you.
