I know this is weird but it's not begging for attention it's an existential dread about passing unnoticed. I love you all and I wouldn't want my passing to go unnoticed, like most Americans I don't have adequate access to healthcare and there's more than a few of you whose absence I would mourn. Don't worry I'm not thinking of self harm it's just a thing that I think about sometimes and I feel I'm probably not alone.
My words are starting to fail because I think your post hit me in a way that makes things hard to think. It's hard to explain but take care of yourself. I was gonna originally joke about being like Herman Cain and keep posting beyond the dead but I think that is more a defense mechanism to keep me from thinking about well dying and all.