Do you do nice things for the reward or just to be nice? If it’s the latter, then the other person’s reaction shouldn’t matter. Letting it irritate you wastes your own energy for no purpose, and the other person will never know about it, you’ll just continue to seethe, which will be added to the next time it happens.
If you understand my frustration then you can also understand that people do things just to be nice but are well within their right to feel disappointed by people who won’t acknowledge their gesture, who almost seem to think such a gesture is meaningless or furthermore entitled to it.
I’ll keep doing nice things, and I’ll keep seething when people are rude in turn when I’m doing nice things, don’t put the moral failure on me.
I don’t believe I’m putting a moral failing anywhere, but I’m sorry that what I said made you feel that way.
The point I’m making is that none of us can control how others behave, and getting angry at them only serves to make us bitter. By disengaging our own feelings from this act, we can lead more content lives, and that’s helpful for our own mental health.
Quit being over analytical nerds. It’s a common courtesy to acknowledge someone doing something nice for you, and it’s totally normal to feel disappointed when that breaks down
No doubt you’re a redditor. Let me guess, you’re probably one of those people who just wished to ‘be left alone’ by everyone when they’re just being polite to you and exercising the basic norms of the social contract? .
I take it you don’t acknowledge people doing polite things for you because you don’t owe them anything? Do you not appreciate when someone’s polite to you?
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I think this is a poor way to frame things.
It’s a realistic way to frame things.
Do you do nice things for the reward or just to be nice? If it’s the latter, then the other person’s reaction shouldn’t matter. Letting it irritate you wastes your own energy for no purpose, and the other person will never know about it, you’ll just continue to seethe, which will be added to the next time it happens.
That said, I do understand your frustration.
If you understand my frustration then you can also understand that people do things just to be nice but are well within their right to feel disappointed by people who won’t acknowledge their gesture, who almost seem to think such a gesture is meaningless or furthermore entitled to it.
I’ll keep doing nice things, and I’ll keep seething when people are rude in turn when I’m doing nice things, don’t put the moral failure on me.
I don’t believe I’m putting a moral failing anywhere, but I’m sorry that what I said made you feel that way.
The point I’m making is that none of us can control how others behave, and getting angry at them only serves to make us bitter. By disengaging our own feelings from this act, we can lead more content lives, and that’s helpful for our own mental health.
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Quit being over analytical nerds. It’s a common courtesy to acknowledge someone doing something nice for you, and it’s totally normal to feel disappointed when that breaks down
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“Entertaining violence”? Can you go back to Reddit please
I would but they killed the Chapo sub
Which is why I'm here
No doubt you’re a redditor. Let me guess, you’re probably one of those people who just wished to ‘be left alone’ by everyone when they’re just being polite to you and exercising the basic norms of the social contract? .
My account sits dormant since they banned the sub.
Why does it bother you so much to not get guaranteed validation?
Ok fine let's take it as close the door in front of their face, and not literally smack them in the face with the door.
It's still eyebrow raising imo to get that worked up.
If not acknowledging someone holding the door for you is not a big deal why should closing the door be?
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I take it you don’t acknowledge people doing polite things for you because you don’t owe them anything? Do you not appreciate when someone’s polite to you?
Are you being polite to actually help?
Or because you want a head pat?
From my upbringing I've learned to stay far away from the latter.
Editing to add context: When it comes to unhoused outreach the people in it for acknowledgement often become liabilities.
I guess it’s some sort of moral hurdle someone needs to pass when they do nice things for you and you don’t acknowledge them.
I personally do acknowledge them.
I just think that you shouldn't do it for the acknowledgement.
Mods have decided I didn't frame anything any way. So I guess there ya go.
We're all human beings my friend. Be excellent to one another.