1. Dying of heatstroke in the summer due to global warming and not having an air conditioner in your fifty-year- old rental apartment that costs £5 million on the market
  1. Freezing to death in the winter because the Labour government just cut your fuel allowance
  1. Cheering with your mates every time migrants drown crossing the Channel
  1. Burning to death in a tower block due to the complete negligence of every single responsible party
  1. Being so transphobic that your family can no longer be around you
  1. Waking up every morning and not taking to the streets to overthrow the inbred hereditary aristocracy that rules over you

https://archive.is/rxuQN

  • Huldra [they/them, it/its]
    ·
    2 months ago

    Like a solid two thirds of this is literally just the author taking a fucking walk and making up nonsense about various fast food/grocery store things or looking at tourist destinations to reference.

    Genuine masterclass in churning out bullshit in a single day, impressive. The British must absolutely execute this little bastard in public, give him an honorary CIA journalism award treatment.

    • Krem [he/him, they/them]
      ·
      2 months ago
      • getting fancy snacks from an overpriced chain
      • travelling all over the worst anglo holiday spots in south/east europe to get drunk and be a dickhead (but ironically)
      • going out in your hometown to get drunk and be a dickhead (but fancily)
      • having a phrasy phrase with your matey mates

      yep, it's middle class anglo time screm-cool

    • Wheaties [she/her]
      ·
      2 months ago

      Whoever made the header image seems more familiar with Britain than the author. They at least knew enough to include alcohol in the picture.