Spent the last two years basically wasted. Surprisingly have moved up a lot in my life in that time, something to be said about the functional alcoholic.
I'm making this post because I feel like fucking hell, and I'm tired and it's like every good feeling has been replaced by dog shit.
But I'm not like craving booze right now and so I guess I'm sort of not dependent on it at the moment. I've been active too, going to shows and parties and such. They've been dramatically less fun, but at least I'm not holed up and away from society like every other time I've tried to get off the sauce.
That's nifty.
Probably will have a drink sometime soon, whatever. Just nice to prove I don't actually HAVE to drink I guess.
My face looks handsome as hell rn too from it lol, bunch of water weight and bloating gone. That's the main positive
LETS FUCKIN GOOOOO! I hit a year this week, DM me if you ever wanna talk!
Hell yeah dude
I'm making this post because I feel like fucking hell, and I'm tired and it's like every good feeling has been replaced by dog shit.
But I'm not like craving booze right now and so I guess I'm sort of not dependent on it at the moment. I've been active too, going to shows and parties and such. They've been dramatically less fun, but at least I'm not holed up and away from society like every other time I've tried to get off the sauce.
Idk if this helps, but (minor) anhedonia when you're detoxing and getting sober is totally normal, your brain chemistry needs some time to refuckulate
Proud of you
Remember that sobriety is a process you have to learn and practice, not a rigid "100% flawless streak" thing overnight for the vast majority of people
Slip ups are normal too, and they're not the end of the world if they happen, or an excuse to give up and spiral if you really want to get clean.
You got this 🚫🍸🚫
if my ability to feel good about anything comes back I'll be content. It's such a weird feeling. I had been getting some exercise these past few months, even if hungover or whatever, and i was starting to be able to get some endorphins from that as well
Now I'm just sore when I exercise. Getting nothing out of anything. Can't even cum right either lmao
been there
have a sad cum bb
(sorry)
I've been trying to channel all my "damn I wish I were fucked up rn" shit into over exercising and chasing the endorphins instead to various success
I've slipped a couple times but I keep telling myself "you're overall doing way better"
That doesn't always feel like enough, but I guess you gotta just keep chipping away at it until it settles in for the long term
Alcohol is a messy a.f. drug but it's thought to work on some opiod receptors as part of its action. Unfortunately they're our shit feels nice receptors (disgusting simplification) and exercise, or rather part of the body's response to it, works on that too.
God hates us, so when our happy receptors are active all the time our brain turns the volume down so we continue to suffer. Removing the alcohol means the volume on the reward pathways is too low right now.
Fortunately even people who blast the fuck out of those pathways with like heroine don't stop them from coming back to a relatively normal sensitivity and usually pretty fast. So you probably don't have to wait long before stuff feels good again and it definitely will happen if you just grit your teeth and rawdog life for a bit.
Hey nice, I am not you but I wouldn't tempt myself with a drug while quitting. I smoked at that sabotaged my efforts a few times before I quit. I'm not exactly down with the AA type always an addict thinking, but it is worth remembering that brains take to things differently and vulnerability can remain. I don't take nicotine or coke anymore because while I'm pretty sure I would be able to use it and stop I know it would be unpleasantly hard to do so.
I drink to much atm, it got out of hand during a bad period of chronic pain and it's been a struggle at times. Posts like this are encouraging.
2 weeks is some good time! I'm trying to quit vaping myself, when this one runs out I'm getting back on the horse.
Good for you. That is huge. That’s cool you are keeping doing things. That was and is a hard one for me but I would feel a lot better than not doing things. Substances work until they don’t. Not sustainable IME.
good on ya. haven't gone longer than like 4-5 days sober in probably two years. to your point about being more handsome below, honestly one of the only actual attractions i have to cutting down rn is wanting to hold onto my Very Young For My Age vanity for longer lmao. i suck.
lol that's not too far from reasoning
Main reasons for the sudden sobriety is
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I'm not getting what I want out of it and I feel dependent on it for bullshit reasons
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Vanity
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Bank account
all valid tbh, i don't even think about how much money i burn on this shit cuz its such a stable part of my ovewrhead but it's A Lot. plus sometimes im doing it just to do it and im not even having fun. but tbh a lot of the times i am having fun and im loving it, cant even use the "i dont even like this shit that much" aspect to cope. that last part goes in phases tho.
yeah I kept running into the I'm not really having very much fun, I'm just sort of trashed for the hell of it wall a lot recently
If I was having fun I doubt I'd even have really given this the attempt lol
yeah fair. for me, even when i'm not Having A Blast, i still find it to be a comfort around my loneliness-anxiety and evening sitting-around-in-my-apartment claustrophobia. idk, there's a very specific feeling i'm seeking to quell. hard to put it into words exactly. (in my megathread post just now and in other times past i've called it The Gnawing)
I'm sitting here trying to word mine
It's like I can only feel positive about something (or someone honestly) when striving for it. When I get "the thing" my mind warps it into something negative, because if i have something it cannot possibly be good.
Booze allowed me some peace with this, but that has faded.
DAE desire is the root of all suffering??????
but i hear ya. i have a restless temperament like that, too. hard to be contented with the day-to-day, with what's right in front of my face and already in my life. don't have answers rn sadly, just commiseration
I fear there is none but to find a way to accept your own nature and mitigate the worst impulses that stem from it.
it's a fucking nightmare lmao
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Consider switching to near beers if you can tolerate something alcohol adjacent without knocking you off the wagon
When I got home from rehab, I basically went STRAIGHT to an energy drink habit. Sending solidarity!
What is near beers? Like NA beers, or something else entirely? Never heard that phrase
