I might be exaggerating but idk, I went to a public university, software engineering, and I spent hell lot of efforts trying to get good at it, I have a lot of FOSS projects on GitHub, I had to stress myself out because I'm broke af and we only had power like 6 hours a day (I'm in a torn country), I'm not the most social person on Earth but I did reach out to friends and family maybe they know somebody who they could recommend me to, but no answer, only four corps got to interview so far, the rest either send a rejection mail or just ignore my email all along, so yeah it sucks and it kinda feels like I just wasted myself burning myself out for nothing, my family is already frowning upon me for being unemployed and I'm starting to lower my bar for getting a job, but I'm afraid of stucking at a crap job with nowhere to go from there and burn myself even further, it just sucks so much, you just put up with a lot of stress and being so fucking broke and having to push through it hoping it will be at least slightly better but no, then you see people who don't even know the slightest getting a job that you're always getting rejected at, and you gotta keep pushing cause that's your only option, honestly I think I have nothing to lose, a lot of nights I really think about ending it but I don't do it, things only have been going worse for me since forever and it doesn't seem to go anywhere, I'm tired, I know working is probably just sugar coated slavery, but I have nothing and it keeps getting worse for me.
If you read that far thank you I really appreciate it, please don't ask me to go to a therapy I'm literally broke and I have nobody to help me financially (even if you want to help me financially, you can't, I live in a torn country)
It took me like 2 years and hundreds of job applications to get an in person interview. I got hired on the spot for what was supposed to be a seasonal job lasting all summer. They laid me off after a month. My manager said I did nothing wrong and asked me if I wanted a letter of recommendation, I said yes please and she ghosted me.
It took me 6 months and hundreds more job applications to get another in person interview. I got hired on the spot but over a month from my hire date until I got to start working.
It's not your fault. The worst was when I had a reference from someone who worked their entire career in that field, nailed a phone interview then got ghosted.
I'll say from experience that if you're just in a shit employment cycle, you end up taking the job that available. Work a few years, keep applying, and just aim for the jobs you like until you land it.
Job searching is like fishing. Some of it is skill. Some of it is seasonal. A big chunk is pure dumb luck. Don't feel like this is your fault. Just know that you're always going to be fishing for that better position, at least until you find a job you don't hate.
honestly I think I have nothing to lose, a lot of nights I really think about ending it but I don't do it, things only have been going worse for me since forever and it doesn't seem to go anywhere, I'm tired, I know working is probably just sugar coated slavery, but I have nothing and it keeps getting worse for me.
Hang in there. I've been where you are. Had a good degree from a good school in a bad year. 2008 sucked for finding a job.
I ended up volunteering at a literacy center for a few months. Volunteering is great for references and for "job experience". Plus you get to do something you feel good about. I also spent a bunch of free time at the gym, which helped as an outlet for stress and anxiety. At least at the gym, you can see your gains.
I applied to everything that looked remotely appealing. I landed a mediocre job at a mediocre firm, but I got to know other people in similar circumstances. It gave me a salary, which offered some degree of autonomy and coworkers to sympathize with. I got a roommate, who ended up being a close friend. I spent a long time bouncing between half a dozen jobs of various quality - gaining connections and experience and a fatter resume. And twenty years later, I'm very happy I didn't toss it all.
Post college slump is a shitty time for a lot of people. Just don't look at this as a merit based system. Look at it as a lottery, where every day offers you a chance at a new ticket.
Remember the immortal words of Brace Belden - the gambler always wins in the end. Just gotta keep rolling, even when you're down. The only thing you lose, in the end, is time. And you've got a lifetime ahead of you to spend.
I'm in a similar position as OP, and I really appreciate what you wrote.
I tried to 'escape' by doing part time stuff and tried to start my own business, and it didn't get off in time. Now, I have to go back, defeated, eventually desperate for a job, financially set back a year or two.
I know I've grown a lot as a person in the past 4 years, but I feel like I'm just getting older and going nowhere.
Trust me, you are far from alone, and this is a global problem. Here I live in the so-called “land of opportunity”….but we’re all out of opportunities and in absolutely no hurry to make some more.
As someone who has struggled between unemployment and underemployment at best for my whole life, this all speaks true. As long as you have some skills, there’s only so much where being the best of the best can take you. I posted a similar complaint and as a fellow Hexbearian said, it just boils down to nepotism and luck.
I won't tell you to do anything, but i feel what you're saying in every screaming cell.
take that!I'm tired, I know working is probably just sugar coated slavery, but I have nothing and it keeps getting worse for me.
You can't give up though. Not because it's worth it, but because only now after feeling just like you for 4 very dangerous years, i am convinced this horror and soul-crushin sadness is a painful, necessary road everyone with a heart that feels and eyes to see must take.
It is right and proper to grieve the world we thought we knew. It is a requirement for anyone who lives what the world could be, and necessary that we may ourselves grow into the kinda people who can dream of something new.
I feel like we're in similar positions.
I'm thinking of putting minimal effort into finding a job, but not giving up. Then, finding ways to get out and connect with people more. Maybe a person I meet has a job, maybe I get a friend, maybe I get overwhelmed and go home early. But, I can't keep trying the same stuff as usual, since it hasn't really been working.
