Wild how basically every time I click on the Libiverse button to see what a thread looks like with the lemmy.world and similar posters lemmitor in it it's sooooo uhhhh

If it's not outright reactionary stuff it's stuff like the attached image. I just don't even know what to say wowee

Idk if this is intentional behavior or the result of being massively out of touch but aaaa

Idk, if this person sees this post somehow and you rly didn't mean this in a transphobic way I rly don't wanna discourage you from trying to use more inclusive language. It's just that being so bad-"weird" (I wish I had a better word to describe this) about people's pronouns or gendered language has the same effect in the end of pushing trans people or women out of spaces as outright transphobia or misogyny :(

If someone you're speaking to on the internet doesn't have listed preferred pronouns, you should use the ungendered pronoun "they" or refer to them without using pronouns ("this person"), and only the latter one if completely necessary for some grammatical or contextual reason (people can perceive it as you not wanting to use their preferred pronouns, which is considered disrespectful if they think you know of them). It can get more complicated than that but like 95% of the time those are good guidelines and 99% of people are probably gonna be cool with you as long as it's obvious you're trying to be respectful. Idk, pronouns 101 but yeah, lol

I actually found the reply in the attached image (https://hexbear.net/comment/5418313) a couple of months ago but I was reminded of it by this:

There was this thread I posted in earlier about male friendships and how intimate men are with each other, it looked kinda empty from our end (cuz we're defedded with the worst of this internet hell-network called Lemmy) but I clicked on the Libiverse button (https://lemmy.ml/post/22904748) and I just see stuff like this inside:

Show

Show

Show

Which is just.... WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU, IF SOMEONE SAID THAT TO ME, AT THE VERY LEAST I WOULD NEVER SPEAK TO THEM AGAIN AND YOU WOULD HAVE TO LITERALLY TORTURE ME TO GET ME TO MENTION IT IN A POSITIVE LIGHT

Yet this guy not only does that, but also makes sure that you know, in the context of that, he would definitely kill people "if anyone ever goes after" his friends visible-disgust

Moving on to more benign Redditor behavior:

Show

I also don't have a word for this weird type of Redditor metaphor where they have some kind of criticism for your post but it's substanceless (who was attacking the straight men lmao, like I guess you could read it as an overgeneralization but it's not entirely wrong lol) and probably ultimately rooted in some kind of bigotry so it has to be veiled in some strange physically-based analogy

I have more slop for you but I hit the image rate limit and I'm impatient so now I switch to direct transcriptions :3

Andy@slrpnk.net, 7 updoots, 4 downdoots, 12 hrs ago

I think it’s interesting that you are comparing “men” and “girls” as opposed to either boys and girls or men and women.

No judgement. Just thought that was interesting.

Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, just be direct about your language-nitpicking or shut the fuck up lmao, insufferable annoying ass Redditors

Lumidaub@feddit.org, 1 updoot, 3 hours ago I say this in the gentlest way possible: you keep writing “there” when you mean “they’re” or “their” and it’s making it hard to read your posts.

Surprisingly there's only like 6 grammar correction replies in that thread, pretty low for Reddit

There's more but you get the idea lol. Such an offputting place lol, solidarity to all our non-Redditor friends who persist in using the Reddit Lemmies despite the best efforts of the cishet white techbros there to push them away, you're welcome here on hexbear-retro anytime catgirl-heart

  • PaX [comrade/them, they/them]
    hexagon
    ·
    edit-2
    1 day ago

    I greatly regret bringing that word "nitpick" into this conversation, especially cuz the person who was "just asking questions" about the infantilization-loaded language of the OP has a good point yea

    Cuz your language criticism isn't nitpicking to me. I guess my new definition would include the people saying over and over in that thread, to the benefit of no one but themselves (cuz it makes them feel good to say it probably), that the OP is using "there" instead of "they're" but would exclude what you said and what Andy@slrpnk.net said (even if the latter was phrased in an unhelpful way imo)

    Am sorry, especially if it bothered you. I just got quite annoyed when reading that thread and ended up being reductive and dismissive

    Idk, these are language crits instead perhaps

    I should stop speaking, like entirely :3

    • Are_Euclidding_Me [e/em/eir]
      ·
      1 day ago

      Oh, you're good! I literally wasn't trying to comment on anything you said, I just saw a cis person who seemed willing to change their language and wanted to very gently suggest they do so. And then they did, immediately, leading me to believe they really are quite cool and a safe person for their young trans relative to be around.

      I barely read the screenshots and your commentary on them, and I skipped most of the actual comments in the thread too.

      I want to reiterate, from where I'm sitting, you're totally fine, I'm not a bit bothered by anything you've said in this thread (I didn't even read most of it). My comment had nothing to do with you or the larger context of the thread! Care-Comrade

      • PaX [comrade/them, they/them]
        hexagon
        ·
        edit-2
        5 hours ago

        Ohh, okay, okay, am glad. Sorry, I have like... a hypervigilance thing or something :/ just worry a lot I offend people without realizing. Has been showing more lately for some reason

        cuddle

        And yeah, "someone" is quite cool and your reply was good advice :3