Permanently Deleted

  • sydnerella11 [she/her]
    ·
    4 years ago

    So I just posted a few days ago about my situation. My brother just OD’d on fentanyl. He’s okay. But I’m not able to handle this

          • sydnerella11 [she/her]
            ·
            4 years ago

            I’m also sorry about your loss. And I’m really sorry because I should have just prefaced everything with that. I’m sorry. I am just so happy I didn’t lose my brother but I am so focused on where to go from here and that had me responding like a dick.

              • sydnerella11 [she/her]
                ·
                edit-2
                4 years ago

                You are fine, I am the one who posted the triggering topic lol. I am just trying to be hyper aware of this stuff because my brother OD’d when he was watching his child and his girlfriend was at work. Her dad died of the same thing. My brother is fine but she is understandably extremely upset and I was just worried about my brother being okay so I discounted her for way too long at first in the conversation. You’re fine.

                Edit: I also mean to add that CPS is apparently involved and I’m legit worried for her as a mom of my nephew. I just worried if I’m centering myself too much because she has something going on as a result that I can’t even begin to imagine. Just for going to work. And the opiate shit going on is insane for this to even be an issue like that. This is ridiculous knowing how far reaching this shit is. And I’m pretty sure the only thing that saved me from it is my literal allergy to opiates

                • the_river_cass [she/her]
                  ·
                  4 years ago

                  I just worried if I’m centering myself too much because she has something going on as a result that I can’t even begin to imagine.

                  have to take care of yourself before you can feasibly be there to help her or your brother. this is hard and it will take work to process. you're doing the right thing by trying to do that. :heart-sickle: solidarity (+ support, if you need it)

          • sydnerella11 [she/her]
            ·
            4 years ago

            I’ll recommend Kratom for sure. I don’t know much about it except that a friend of mine was also addicted and hid it and he used kratom to get clean. What is pps?

      • sydnerella11 [she/her]
        ·
        4 years ago

        Yeah I am trying to encourage him to get help this morning. Ultimately nobody can force him to get help but this is my first time becoming aware of the problem. Of course, I’m aware that OD’ing on fentanyl indicates a longer problem right? Like I find it hard to believe that my brother would just go and buy heroin for fun or no reason but rather that he was on pills and couldn’t get a hold of those is what I’m understanding. So I don’t think this won’t happen again. And I will probably take you and some others in the thread up on that if that’s okay to DM you.

    • VHS [he/him]
      ·
      4 years ago

      Glad your brother's okay. Solidarity :heart-sickle:

      • sydnerella11 [she/her]
        ·
        4 years ago

        Thank you. I’m just so shocked. I was worried about him before but I didn’t realize he was on opiates

      • sydnerella11 [she/her]
        ·
        4 years ago

        Thank you. I just visited him in the hospital. He had to be brought back twice last night apparently. I’m trying to convince him that rehab would be a good option but he’s not so interested rn. I’ll keep trying and being there for him

      • sydnerella11 [she/her]
        ·
        4 years ago

        Thanks. I have substance abuse issues too. With alcohol. I just didn’t know my brother was on opiates. At least drinking is kind of slow and relatively predictable. I wish I would have understood though. If anyone should understand this in my family it would be me. I’m sorry i worry if that’s harmful to say. I feel like I say a lot of harmful things

          • sydnerella11 [she/her]
            ·
            4 years ago

            I’m literally the only family member who isn’t in the hospital right now because I have an early morning meeting that me missing at this point could cost me my job. Because of all the other things I have fucked up at my job this year. But I do hear what you are saying, I just do feel a lot of guilt on a lot of different fronts about this. I know I’m not responsible for the addiction but I am responsible for myself and I found out when I already had been drinking (so I don’t have a way over there even if I wanted to) and I have to prioritize something this fucking dumb like a meeting with a literal zoo so I can hopefully keep my job and not get evicted

        • storyofracheltoo [she/her]
          arrow-down
          4
          ·
          4 years ago

          I feel like I say a lot of harmful things

          People don't understand how broken I am and as a result they think I'm being malicious in some way when really I just don't know how to communicate and act like a normal person.

      • sydnerella11 [she/her]
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        4 years ago

        Do you think that’s cute or funny? I’m not one to feed the troll but I’m just trying to understand what type of leftist you brand yourself as to say some goober ass shit like that

        • storyofracheltoo [she/her]
          arrow-down
          5
          ·
          4 years ago

          Same as the ones who call themselves leftists and then shit on someone asking for help because they happen to also be an addict.

        • goober [none/use name]
          arrow-down
          9
          ·
          4 years ago

          You sound pretty white too tbh. This is a leftist website ma'am