Capitalism? What? Fascism has nothing to do with that. Ideas are entirely responsible for fascism. Material conditions? I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. Fascism wouldn't have existed if Hitler either died as a baby or hadn't written Mein Kampf.

Oh, and, by the way, WWI could have been averted if that archduke didn't get shot. There is nothing more to the outbreak of WWI.

Sincerely, libs.

  • KobaCumTribute [she/her]
    ·
    edit-2
    4 years ago

    Honestly yeah, of all the "this one event had really big, horrible, far-reaching consequences"s you could point to in the 20th century, the suppression of the Spartacist revolt in Germany is one of the most pivotal. If it had succeeded the USSR wouldn't have been alone and the civil unrest that France and the UK faced in the following decade would have had more socialist successes behind them, to say nothing of the impact that removing the Nazis from the equation altogether would have had. It wouldn't have been a clean or bloodless timeline by any means, obviously, but it would have been an important difference.

    But my point is just, a real person with real influence and real power dying is very different from if that individual had simply not existed at all, because, well, while anyone could theoretically become that person, once someone is then their death damages the movement they're a part of.

    So tl;dr for any time travelers: don't kill baby hitler, [parody] the headquarters of the NSDAP in the late 1920s instead; break the movement instead of imagining one person could create it from whole cloth. Or better yet give the KPD a fucking gundam or ten in 1918 so this is a moot point, cause if you've got time travel you better at least have some fucking gundams to spare.

    Edit: actually just go find that asshole fish that crawled out of the primordial sea and roast its dumb ass, save us all this trouble from the get go. Great man theory might be bullshit but no one said anything about fish, so I'm blaming that slimy, wannabe-air-breathing motherfucker.

    • VILenin [he/him]
      hexagon
      ·
      4 years ago

      This is great fish theory. The material Conditions behind the move to land would still exist. The only logical solution would be to destroy the planet.

      • KobaCumTribute [she/her]
        ·
        4 years ago

        But that would also negatively impact the marine life. Instead, I propose regular gundam-facilitated patrols along primordial shorelines to find any asshole fish that thinks land might be better, and provide for them a comprehensive education in why that's actually the worst decision possible before returning the newly educated fish to the water.

        • VILenin [he/him]
          hexagon
          ·
          4 years ago

          Aquatic humans evolve, following our timeline but underwater. I know this would happen because nothing good is allowed to happen.

          • KobaCumTribute [she/her]
            ·
            4 years ago

            Yeah, they can try to invent fire underwater but all they'll get is some soggy sticks.

            • VILenin [he/him]
              hexagon
              ·
              4 years ago

              The laws of physics will adapt to accommodate the worst possible scenario

              • KobaCumTribute [she/her]
                ·
                4 years ago

                What if we give dolphinoid Rosa Luxemburg a water gundam to fight the fish korps

                • VILenin [he/him]
                  hexagon
                  ·
                  edit-2
                  4 years ago

                  It turns out that time traveling Bernie has followed you. As you prepare to hand over ownership, you feel the barrel of a gun pressed against the back of your head.

                  "Not today, kid" He says.

                  Fear stricken, you freeze. He takes advantage of this opportunity to shoot dolphinoid Rosa. He ties you to a large pole and forces you to watch as he butchers her and has her for dinner.

                  Afterwards, he laughs maniacally before killing you.

                  He finds asshole fish and drags it onto land.