The first assignment my teacher gave us in AP US history was to write an essay defending the idea that the Civil War was over state’s rights to govern themselves and not slavery. What a shitty class that was.

And I just remembered: At the beginning of the first class she introduced herself by silently walking into the classroom and writing “FBI” in giant letters on the board and then saying “FBI. Full. Blooded. Italian. That is everything you need to know about me.” And she bragged that she loved to debate her students because she never, ever lost a debate with them.