I'm falling in love and it's genuinely scary. this society is so violent and the risks to my body and life as we organize and fight back are something I've learned to accept. but the idea that my partner will be right there with me through the worst of it - the years that come - is terrifying. sure, we might break up but that neither means I'll love them any less nor stop fearing the awful things that may befall them as we both persist in our opposition to an incomprehensibly powerful world order.

on an lighter note, I should probably wait to tell them I love them for a bit, huh? well, I technically did while drunk on the first night we hooked up but we're both pretending that didn't happen. but we've only been together for two weeks and it's way too soon. we've been friends and comrades for about two years so the feelings are genuine, rooted in a real bond that formed slowly and organically, but we're still unsure of our footing, it feels like. idk, I definitely won't wait past another two weeks because of the course of events and the fears I mentioned in the first paragraph, nor do I think they'll react badly... I think I'm just afraid of being vulnerable.