I had always assumed that if a man had gotten a woman pregnant, then if that pregnancy is carried to term, both partners should be financially responsible for the child regardless whether the man had wanted to have the child or not. The mindset being "they got them pregnant, so you have to face the consequences'".

I was talking with some people online, and they asserted that if the man did not want to have the child, then they should be able to apply to be resolved of any financial responsibility towards caring for it. I was at first against this proposal, but I feel like I now understand it better. Our current legislation was created at a time where abortion was tantamount to murder, and since it was illegal, an obligation of financial responsibility was the only way to ensure that women weren't stranded with children they couldn't afford to raise. But now that we live in a world where abortion is legal (for now), and where abortion procedures are safer than carrying the child to term, there doesn't seem to be a good argument for men still needing to be financially responsible for unwanted children. Men probably would still need to assist in paying for the procedure, but outside of that, I think they had a point. Please explain to me if there is anything I'm failing to consider here.

I also want to apologize for the binary language I used in writing this. I tried at first to write this in a more inclusive way, but I struggled wrapping my head around it. If anyone can educate me in how to write in a way that doesn't disclude non-binary comrades, I would appreciate it.

  • PapaEmeritusIII [any]
    2·
    4 years ago

    “Currently, society expects individuals to take on the burden of providing for a child. Therefore it should be considered fine and good for one parent to walk out and leave the child and remaining parent in a really precarious situation”

    See, we can interpret your arguments in a bad faith way too

    • ofriceandruin [none/use name]
      9·
      4 years ago

      I'm saying that nobody should be in a precarious situation. If one partner wants an abortion then let them have it. If the other doesn't want the raise the child then let the state help with aid. It's not mutually exclusive, unless you're operating on some sort of weird austerity mindset, or some weird Jordan Peterson "men are men and should pay" shit, or some other kind of zero-sum view.

      • Zuzak [fae/faer, she/her]
        1·
        4 years ago

        The problem can be alleviated somewhat through social programs and the like, but beyond that I don’t know how we might reshape society in such a way that we have more safe and nurturing environments for children that would take some of the burden off of the parents.

        “listen, I really support universal healthcare, but you gotta understand, at our present moment, it’s just not feasible… we gotta tighten our belts… we can’t just have it… oh but you wanna start a war with iran, well then here’s a blank check. Listen guys… I’m a leftist and I believe that all this austerity talk is just right-wing BS that has no basis in material reality… oh but when it comes to child support there’s ‘no money’ for it… guess we gotta tighten our belts, even if one partner didn’t want the kid.”

        Lol please stop pretending that your comment was anything resembling good faith.

        • ofriceandruin [none/use name]
          10·
          4 years ago

          However, the present conditions being what they are, you do have to bear part the responsibility for bringing a child into the world. It’s not ideal, but until we establish FALGSC it’s necessary.

          This is what you said, which is basically some kind of incrementalist argument. I reject that premise. We can have these things now. I was responding to that if it wasn't clear.

          • Zuzak [fae/faer, she/her]
            1·
            4 years ago

            We cannot reshape society overnight in such a way that there are strong social bonds that allow the burden of raising a child to be shared instead of falling exclusively on the parents. Maybe someday we'll have that in an ideal, FALGSC society, but in the meantime it's necessary to rely on the band-aid solution of social programs.

            I can understand how you might misinterpret that but going full hog into implying I support austerity and war with Iran makes it clear that you need to hog out or log out.

      • PapaEmeritusIII [any]
        ·
        4 years ago

        Societal aid for parents is indeed cool and good. I’m with you there. I think the source of contention here is that most people who argue in favor of “financial abortions” don’t also advocate for the societal aid stuff; there are a lot of MRAs out there who seem to get off on the idea of leaving single mothers completely destitute and resourceless. If you’re not extremely explicit about the fact that you’re not one of those MRA types, people will think you’re one of them.

        • ofriceandruin [none/use name]
          5·
          4 years ago

          I've made it clear multiple times that I want the state to take care of the child instead of doing this weird personal responsibility shit (e.g. "you should've known that sex is bad, just like Sister Mary said in Sunday school"). It's the people on this thread who can't seem to read and automatically assume that I'm some sort of MRA incel.

    • infuziSporg [e/em/eir]
      3·
      4 years ago

      That is not a bad-faith way of interpreting their argument.

      I bet you fifty (50) USD that @ofriceandruin has said something semantically identical to that somewhere on the Internet.