in the process sort of concede that it is bad to be both "slutty" and "picky"
I think the argument is that these are derogatory terms, intended to imply a degree of sexual selfishness.
The slut narrative is one in which one partner expresses romantic love that the other exploits before tossing the sincere partner aside. I don't think this describes someone who is pan and genuinely does experience romantic love with a variety of partners. Nor does it describe someone who is exploring sexuality and decides they are not that into you.
Similarly, "picky" implies a kind of elitism, wherein the partner is never good enough. While asexual describes someone who isn't particularly erotic.
These descriptions of sexuality ultimately distinguish between callous treatment of others and internal sexual orientation. Being pan or ace shouldn't carry a stereotype of being fickle or frigid, because that's not what they represent.
I think the argument is that these are derogatory terms, intended to imply a degree of sexual selfishness.
The slut narrative is one in which one partner expresses romantic love that the other exploits before tossing the sincere partner aside. I don't think this describes someone who is pan and genuinely does experience romantic love with a variety of partners. Nor does it describe someone who is exploring sexuality and decides they are not that into you.
Similarly, "picky" implies a kind of elitism, wherein the partner is never good enough. While asexual describes someone who isn't particularly erotic.
These descriptions of sexuality ultimately distinguish between callous treatment of others and internal sexual orientation. Being pan or ace shouldn't carry a stereotype of being fickle or frigid, because that's not what they represent.