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  • BountifulEggnog [she/her]
    ·
    4 months ago
    brainworms

    "liberal spots me in public and thinks I am a lesser, third gender and wants brownie points" (from who?)

    I think the fear is this step is more "liberal spots me in public and thinks I am mentally ill weirdo, and wants to feel good about doing something nice for a [word]"

    I mean I agree that we should assume the best of people (and even if they do think I'm a weirdo I need attention) but shrug-outta-hecks does that not seem like a lib thing to do, even if not consciously?

    Also taking this moment to ask you if you're sure this is really a discussion you want to have.

    • magi [null/void]M
      ·
      edit-2
      4 months ago
      spoiler

      Personally I think it's been dragged out long enough..

    • ashinadash [she/her]
      ·
      edit-2
      4 months ago

      Well obviously I fucked up again, that's a given. Replies would have stopped if I took a better approach, the actual secret truth is that I am just fucking dogshit. So I appreciate the kindly cautioning at me being an asshat again.

      But even if we take at face value that every cis person is by default a fucking monster, (and there is evidence that they're not) this is a bunch of weird extrapolating and inferring from other experiences for someone she doesn't even know when she isn't even sure she got clocked? Wearing a hoodie and a mask, like do you see where this isn't even a line of thought worth considering to begin with? Like is this realistic? 'Every single (assumed) cis person who compliments you in public is evil slime who can TELL UR TRANS and thinks you are lesser and only wants brownie points', do you see how this is a little goofy?

      This is exactly why /tttt/ is bad for newly trans people especially, anything remotely possible is assumed to be the default if it's the absolute worst, and people get wrapped up in it.

      • BountifulEggnog [she/her]
        ·
        4 months ago

        I am not "cautioning at me being an asshat". I don't want you to get frustrated, for your own sake. Its obvious you felt terrible the other day (when you shouldn't have), and I don't want you to feel terrible again. I don't think you fucked up, I think you have been very reasonable and patient and have done a good job explaining yourself. You are a wonderful person who has done a wonderful job explaining things to someone who has things to work on. I understand being overly critical at yourself (lord knows I am) but it is completely unjustified here. You didn't do anything wrong.

        Yes I see how its goofy, I agree with you.

        • ashinadash [she/her]
          ·
          edit-2
          4 months ago

          Alright well thank you, sorry this is draining my brain again, uh no more replies in this comment thread bocchi-head-shake and sorry I didn't mean to imply you were being shitty or anything. Just feel like I should be doing better, but I appreciate the positivity...

          I think to some extent, like obviously the world is and can be a really dogshit place, but if you let this stuff get on top of you it can crush you. I think places like this serve as an antidote to that sort of shit, I guess.

          Also new hard rule, I am never mentioning /tttt/ terminology again. My apologies.

          • BountifulEggnog [she/her]
            ·
            4 months ago

            I suspected that. Take care of yourself. You didn't imply I was being shitty at all.

            Unfortunately, you can play all your cards right and still lose. You can only help someone so much.

            It serves that purpose for me :)

          • BountifulEggnog [she/her]
            ·
            4 months ago

            Also new hard rule, I am never mentioning /tttt/ terminology again. My apologies.

            You don't need to apologize to me for this, I've already known about everything you've said.

        • magi [null/void]M
          ·
          4 months ago

          I'm also behind the scenes trying to keep things in check..