Gender identity and sexual attraction are separate mechanisms. Embracing masculine expressions as a cishet man is, as far as I can tell, an identity-affirming process. It does not make them want to fuck themselves.
Hard to say just because the words aren’t always super precise. I’m definitely not trying to say you should do anything. I guess what I’m trying to say is that there are different attractions. Romantic, sexual, aesthetic, platonic, etc. So you can judge your own attractiveness with one and not another or a combination of them
I feel you. The common wisdom seems to be that it’s rarely as impossible as it seems to adjust your presentation, but it’s hard to deny that it feels insurmountable sometimes, especially if it’s not something you’ve given a lot of thought prior. I personally have ignored my own appearance as much as possible for a long time.
Yeah we super do not give people the proper language to differentiate between them. Honestly it would have been very helpful to me fighting off my shame around attraction if I’d been able to tell the difference between horny while a girl is present, being sexually attracted to a girl, and being romantically attracted to a girl. Would have made me feel less creepy and probably just general more sociable
Gender identity and sexual attraction are separate mechanisms.
I think it's a little more complicated than that, at least in my experience. I know a lot of other lesbians that have spent a lot of time asking "do I want to be her or do her" about a lot of women they thought were neat too lol.
My other reply was a quick shitpost on break but I wanna respond more seriously now that I have time. I think the logic is perfectly reasonable, but the problem with it is, it's logic. Gender and sexuality are based on feelings, and feelings don't care about your facts. In this context, it's like that Spongebob meme where Patrick agrees with everything and then at the end he's like, "That's not my wallet." That's everybody, in this context. You can argue that if a straight guy finds women attractive, and he wants to look attractive, then he should want to look like a woman. But then he can just be like, "No." And that's valid! You don't have to have facts and logic backing up how you want to present or who you're attracted to.
Another reason logic doesn't really work here is that there's too many factors. I could just as easily say, "Logically, men benefit the most from privilege so everybody should want to present as a man." There are just too many factors to consider, whichever argument touches on the factors that you personally care about is going to feel the most compelling. "Skirt go spinny" is just as strong of an argument as anything else if that's what matters to you.
deleted by creator
:side-eye-1: :side-eye-2:
deleted by creator
“Still cis tho”
Seriously tho, whatever you feel is valid.
:meow-hug:
You better watch out for people protesting construction on indigenous land
With how hard you're pipelining :data-laughing:
Cuz straight men are all still a little gay, at least for themselves.
deleted by creator
When you look this good it's hard not to get a little hot :pingu-horny:
deleted by creator
Pro tip: Suppression doesn’t make anything go away, it just compounds the pressure.
deleted by creator
Could you explain what this means? I’ve never heard that term before. 🙂
deleted by creator
deleted by creator
Gender identity and sexual attraction are separate mechanisms. Embracing masculine expressions as a cishet man is, as far as I can tell, an identity-affirming process. It does not make them want to fuck themselves.
deleted by creator
Hard to say just because the words aren’t always super precise. I’m definitely not trying to say you should do anything. I guess what I’m trying to say is that there are different attractions. Romantic, sexual, aesthetic, platonic, etc. So you can judge your own attractiveness with one and not another or a combination of them
deleted by creator
I feel you. The common wisdom seems to be that it’s rarely as impossible as it seems to adjust your presentation, but it’s hard to deny that it feels insurmountable sometimes, especially if it’s not something you’ve given a lot of thought prior. I personally have ignored my own appearance as much as possible for a long time.
deleted by creator
Yeah we super do not give people the proper language to differentiate between them. Honestly it would have been very helpful to me fighting off my shame around attraction if I’d been able to tell the difference between horny while a girl is present, being sexually attracted to a girl, and being romantically attracted to a girl. Would have made me feel less creepy and probably just general more sociable
I think it's a little more complicated than that, at least in my experience. I know a lot of other lesbians that have spent a lot of time asking "do I want to be her or do her" about a lot of women they thought were neat too lol.
I have a friend who went on a rant like this before... turns out there actually non-binary...
...specifically a demi-boy...:thonk-trans:
I personally vibe with this viewpoint tho so idk.
My other reply was a quick shitpost on break but I wanna respond more seriously now that I have time. I think the logic is perfectly reasonable, but the problem with it is, it's logic. Gender and sexuality are based on feelings, and feelings don't care about your facts. In this context, it's like that Spongebob meme where Patrick agrees with everything and then at the end he's like, "That's not my wallet." That's everybody, in this context. You can argue that if a straight guy finds women attractive, and he wants to look attractive, then he should want to look like a woman. But then he can just be like, "No." And that's valid! You don't have to have facts and logic backing up how you want to present or who you're attracted to.
Another reason logic doesn't really work here is that there's too many factors. I could just as easily say, "Logically, men benefit the most from privilege so everybody should want to present as a man." There are just too many factors to consider, whichever argument touches on the factors that you personally care about is going to feel the most compelling. "Skirt go spinny" is just as strong of an argument as anything else if that's what matters to you.
deleted by creator