Liberals are so dumb they'll make fun of someone for getting a Trump tattoo while getting the Deathly Hallows symbol on their bicep

  • gayhobbes [he/him]
    hexagon
    ·
    4 years ago

    Liberals are so classist they'll make fun of Trump supporters for being racist but never use anything other than a Southern accent to do it

    • KamalaHarris [she/her]
      ·
      4 years ago

      It's a good start, but needs a little work. Here, how about:

      Have you ever noticed how liberals will kill us all? It's true! They will kill us all!

      There, now it's witty observational comedy.

        • AsleepInspector
          ·
          4 years ago

          I read it in Kamala voice, so I suddenly feel soothed by her motherly tone and the cuffs cutting the circulation from my wrists

  • TheOriginalLib [none/use name]
    ·
    4 years ago

    And what's the deal with liberals anyway? They are SO DUMB...

    Audience: How dumb are they???

    They are SO DUMB that they think "class consciousness" is when you stay awake during beginners calculus! Buh dum tss thank you I'll be here all week!

  • qublic69 [none/use name]
    ·
    4 years ago

    Liberals are so woke they double down when they feel criticized for their carnism or ableism.
    They gotta stand up and reassert their values, it's the right thing to do.

      • qublic69 [none/use name]
        ·
        4 years ago

        Cultural relativism means torture is okay, but only when White people are doing it.

        • qublic69 [none/use name]
          ·
          edit-2
          4 years ago

          I'm really terrible at this lazy comedian thing... [boring joke removed]

          • qublic69 [none/use name]
            ·
            edit-2
            4 years ago

            I once met a liberal who said you could joke about anything; so then I made a joke about Nazis and they got offended.

            edit: come to think of it, I might have plagiarized this one.

            • qublic69 [none/use name]
              ·
              edit-2
              4 years ago

              The reason liberal Germans are doing so well against coronavirus (wearing masks, social distancing) is because they are just taking orders and nobody wants to shatter that illusion.

  • lib_0000429384 [any]
    ·
    4 years ago

    Liberals hate leftists for the same reason you'd hate someone at a theater who kept yelling "These are all actors, none of this is real." Liberals are trying to enjoy a fictional performance about their side being heroic protagonists, and leftists keep disrupting the illusion.

    https://mobile.twitter.com/caitoz/status/1299093564089970693

    • gayhobbes [he/him]
      hexagon
      ·
      4 years ago

      I feel like I heard something really awful from Caitlin but not sure what it was. I vaguely recall TERF something something. But I don't want to spread something vague and fake if I'm wrong.

      • lib_0000429384 [any]
        ·
        4 years ago

        Damn, hopefully not. Didn't mean to shill for a bad person if that's the case - just saw it on reddit and wanted to give credit to the source.

        • gayhobbes [he/him]
          hexagon
          ·
          4 years ago

          Ah like I said I don't know, so don't feel bad or anything, I was just curious if you knew.

  • AsleepInspector
    ·
    4 years ago

    Threads like this made me wish I had the creativity and verbal acrobatics of a lib defending current the current healthcare system.

  • Crowtee_Robot [he/him]
    ·
    4 years ago

    If you think Marx and Engels is the new folk duo at Starbucks, you might be a liberal.

    • gayhobbes [he/him]
      hexagon
      ·
      4 years ago

      If you think Rosa Luxemburg is Ruth Bader Ginsburg's best friend, you might be a liberal

  • Crowtee_Robot [he/him]
    ·
    4 years ago

    I love liberals and their whole resistance. The only thing they resist more than Trump is a getting something besides a mimosa at brunch. rimshot

  • gayhobbes [he/him]
    hexagon
    ·
    4 years ago

    Liberals are so gay they support gays building the apparatus of the American war machine and participating in imperialist wars