[CW: Transphobia]
As a non-binary person, I now have to operate under the assumption that any trans person I meet has a good chance of hating my guts simply because of my gender identity (ironic). I really fucking hate that I cannot undo this mindset because of how common transmedicalism and enbyphobia in the trans community has become.
I can't even see a post on social media that says something like "Trans Rights!!!" and not feel uncomfortable because my initial reaction has become "Does that include me, though? Do you support my rights?". I will always identify as trans, but I'm heavily frightened by the possibility that transphobic attacks I experience are not just gonna be from mostly cis people.
Now, at every fucking turn, I have to ponder if I belong in any trans spaces or not. After going through harsh amounts of abusive transphobia from cis people, having trans people go out of their way to exclude me has done more to make me feel alone than anything else, and it's absolutely not what I need right now.
When I was 16 I was helping organize groups for trans kids and trans teens to meet up in our state and one of the most stressful things I have dealt with during that time was the rise of transmedicalism. I would have kids coming to me crying about the horrible things some truscum kid said to them every week or two, it never stopped no matter how many slideshow presentations and discussions we had.
The indoctrination these kids went through because of piece of shit transmedicalists on YouTube was nearly impenetrable and nearly always accompanied a careening dissent into right wing politics. The only option was to go over their heads and contact their parents and if that didn't work we'd just have to ban them from the groups.