Imagine, if you will, a curse which makes you only able to recall the last three topics you have thought about. Also imagine that you live in a situation where nobody else you meet in person really gives a shit about leftist ideals the same way you do, and have a daily routine which is mostly staring at the television. Imagine trying to accomplish any self-improvement or even self-care while having no long-term memory beyond writing little sticky notes for yourself.
I'm not sure what to do here, since anything I can do to get in a better situation requires planning, and I cannot focus well enough to plan. Am I doomed to be a meat puppet controlled by fucking sloth demons or something?
On generic Adderall and it stops life from hurting, but only I can actually take actions to get out of here.
Like... being in a living situation with a career where I can actually make choices for myself? Performing self-care instead of being glued to a screen? Not basing most of my behavior around finding ways to stop my mimd from wandering into existential dread?
CBT fam. Helped me not only with being more productive but also in managing my emotions a la RSD.
One example would be the spiral of negative emotions I felt when I thought I messed up or when someone would think less of me. The emotions would be intense and I'd be on a self-hate train. With CBT, I have become more aware of how those thoughts can lead to negative spirals and have been able to if not completely eliminate, then atleast mitigate the effects of those automatic thoughts that inevitably come. Helped a ton in managing my anger as well.
And the crazy thing is, I didn't go to therapy for this. I just read a book on CBT and just doing that has given me amazing results. Not to mention all the improvements in my productivity from applying the other tools in the book.
The Adult ADHD toolkit is the only book I've read on this and it has been very helful so far. Here is a link to download the book in either pdf or epub format.
Just try to finish the finish the first 7 chapters. They're the most relevant imo.
Remind me to actually get this book instead of tabbing it “for later” and then forgetting for 10 months because I have ADHD
I feel this. There's lots of educational or agitational material I've been wanting to write, and various other projects that have been rolling over from one week to the next to the next.
Right out of high school, I was jobless and living in my parents' home, just on my laptop all day, for some time; I felt like I couldn't achieve anything, that I was good for nothing. At a certain point I went to college, started to rack up a reasonable number of Ws, and met a bunch of local leftists IRL. Still, it often feels like my brain holds me back; I'm still very disorganized, being late and missing deadlines and struggling to garner the executive function for what is "the basics" for most people; I wonder what my life would be like if it hadn't taken the (eventually) fortunate twists that it did.
I cannot focus well enough to plan.
I don't believe this. It sounds like something you've internalized from shortcomings, but it's not serving you well.
Brains aren't static. Yours will probably benefit from doing more than sticky notes, and having a planner and folder that you take everywhere and write stuff in. The key to this is making a habit of referring back to it. It's like working out: there's a hump of inertia to overcome just to do it, but it makes you feel good about yourself afterward, and the more you do it, the easier it gets.
imagine that you live in a situation where nobody else you meet in person really gives a shit about leftist ideals the same way you do
:yea:
have a daily routine which is mostly staring at the television
:shrek-pixel-despair: My parents pretty much stopped raising me when I was like eight or something in favor of watching tv and working (now they also stare at facebook and phones). In addition to having the social skills of a slug they also decided to trap me in a deadbeat suburb. I've spent a lot time thinking how much better my life would have been with just marginally better conditions.
you're a good leftist in my book as long as you hate landlords and the private ownership of capital
Autism makes me a bad one, cause I can't fuckin' relate to, or talk to basically anyone.