Look right, I can remember retro g*mers making jokes about the Game Gear being 2big and 2heavy back in the day, probably in the 2000s. Classic Game Room watchers remember. Same for the Lynx. The Wii U's tea tray controller was derided for being beeeeg. I can also recall people saying that the PS Vita was kinda large back when it came out, which tbf it is pushing the definition of "pocketable" for the boys and takes up a lot of purse space.
It sort of felt like reality broke down in 2017. The first thing I did when the Switch was announced was make a joke about putting a Game Gear in your pocket, but suddenly nobody else gave a damn that the Switch is like ten inches long. Most dildos are not that long.... 
I get that it's a hybrid, but suddenly the dynamic shifted from "if it can't fit my dude pockets it's no good!" to "aw yeah bruh just get a hardcase and throw it in a backpack!" I do support backpack gang, but you almost may as well get a laptop at that point.
Handheld size has become progressively more comical over the years though, with my favourite example being the Steam Deck which is actually considerably longer than a Wii U Gamepad at an XL 13" 
Tell ya what, I couldn't fit that!!
I'm not really against the existence of larger handhelds on its own, I have long fingers and a DS Lite or PS Vita will give me handcramps sometimes. But it's like a weirder version of when all phones became "phablets" and impossible to use with one hand, suddenly all handhelds are as big as the Wii U pad. (Switch Lite excluded, though it's still larger than a Vita) It also seems like the PS Vita and 3DS primed everyone to accept hilariously short battery life? The PSP 3000/Go and DS Lite/DSi could get anywhere from 8 to 20 hours depending on your settings, that was awesome. The 3DS and Vita won't hold out for more than three hours under duress, though. Most modern portable PCs have worse battery than that, even...
I guess I'm just wondering wha happun??? I know there's a large contingent of people who never take handhelds outside the house anyway (based) and just use them on the couch, but I don't think the Deck would be much more pleasant to handle in an armchair or whatever. That's one thicc-ass boi.
It may hurt to acknowledge this but nobody but Nintendo ever made a truly successful handheld game system
The PSP sold a cool 80 million units, which is why they made a PSP 2 =) PSP was such a banger, loads of cool games, Idk. I can agree that the GameGear and Lynx flopped tho...
I have a PSP, my original PSP-2000 from back in the day. I like my PSP. But it was up against the DS, the most successful handheld of all time. It was never really a threat to Nintendo's eternal domination of handhelds.
Which is too bad, really. It could have been literally the best gadget on earth if Sony hadn't hamstrung it with proprietary formats, a $200 smartphone in 2004.
True, Nintendo literally never faced stiff competition from anybody... Nerds were on GameFAQs and Neogaf talking about the PSP about to steamroll the DS... still, it was a pretty big hit for Sony.
Also Sony fuckin loooooves the proprietary way too much. They could have just used SD, and then Micro SD on the Vita, but weh. Also I think the cards offset the cost of the system somewhat fwiw...
Not just the cards, imagine the timeline with like UMD drives for PCs, ultralight laptops, etc.
Sure, but it's not really properly a handheld. Yes, you hold it in your hands, but I agree with the premise here that handhelds should be pocketable.
Also, the Steam deck's total sales are closer to the N-Gage than the GBA.
should be pocketable.
Or at least fit in a purse, and I've had purses big enough to fit small laptops, that would not accomodate a steam deck
Arguably the Vita is lasting longer than the 3DS cause the store is open, doubly so when you consider it still means life
The actual handheld size handheld market is now all chinese emulator machines from companies like powkiddy and anbernic (and also smartphones)
There are so many of the fuckin things they come in every possible size
Real, the RG 35xxSP looks rad. I do miss dedicated handhelds a little tho...
I would totally get the RG35xxSP if I didn't already have a powkiddy V90.
They have to compete with smartphones, and that seems to have settled on the switch/steamdeck size.
Different niches I guess, figures amerikkkans would want handhelds to be hueg too...
The GBA was peak handheld tech. I had the SP too but honestly still preferred the OG over it.
The SP had a vastly superior screen, but the ergonomics were way better on the OG for my gorilla hands
The OG was comfy but MY GAWD was it ever impossible to see ANYTHING in Castlevania…
Konami's team really did just say "Skill issue. Why don't you have night vision? Nerd."
“Just twist that screw underneath the WARRANTY VOID IF BROKEN seal to make it brighter dawg it’s easy”
Oh dang can you actually turn up the brightness/gain on an original GBA? Today I Learned!!
Ou dude you can but it’s DAMGER! It changes the depth of the screen to the back of the unit, which makes the image much more see-able. It voids warranty and it super touchy. BUT NOW YOU CAN PLAY CASTLEVANIA
Bro, dude, broseph. All GBA warranties are void, it sounds like it'd be more worthwhile to just do an SP swap though.
Do you just not remember the screen at all? Or the cost of all those AA batteries? The SP's screen and rechargability was a huge deal at the time
Did NiMH rechargeables exist back then? As a kid I made so much landfill fodder killing batteries with my GBC, but rechargeables would have helped so much...
They existed but they sucked real bad. They were really expensive and didn't last very long, and took way longer to charge than discharge.
Sucks, nowadays I run exclusively on cheap NiMH rechargers and you can charge four 1200mah AAs in two hours, they're only 1.2V but they're good for all kinds of stuff
I think the only device I still use that has non-lithium batteries is the stylus pen for my laptop that takes AAAA.
Fun fact: the inside of a 9V battery is literally just six AAAAs in series.
I don't understand this meme :/ the GBA is more comfy than an SP but that's not saying much. The GBA itself had enough graphical and processing capability to go around but its sound setup suuuuucked. I think the DS was probably better tbh.
the sp was clearly superior to the gba in almost anything, but it was a pain to play with (for me at least). i could have long sessions on a gba without any problem, but playing with the sp for long time was painful and uncomfortable. it was okay for rpg or games that did not require high reflexes or button mashing
The SP was a handcramper, those tiny lil shoulder buttons... Trying to play Megaman Zero on that thing...
It's my nostalgia talking. I never had the DS but I probably would have liked it better, granted I've never played any DS games yet.
Why was the game gear too big, but the steam deck isn't?
Well you see, as you grow older and become an adult, your eyes get worse but your hands and pockets become larger (usually
)But actually though, I think people would've complained less about the game gear or the Lynx if the size of the screens was much larger than they were, in comparison to the size of the unit. Screen-to-Body ratio is more critical than you think for handhelds, and people are more willing to put up with a large device if the screen is appropriately larger. If the screen on a steam deck or Switch was only 4 inches diagonally, people would be bitching a lot more.
The Wii U gamepad, you've got me there. Idk, I think people just weren't ready for it yet, and it was literally just a controller that you couldn't even use while charging or as the main display at launch. The form factor of the gamepad was thinking so far ahead of where the software or hardware was that it probably shouldn't be surprising that
s didn't get it.Also, this week was the first time I've charged my 3ds in over a year and I still play a ton of New Leaf, idk what you're on about with a 3 hour battery life.
I did think about the childhood -> adulthood pipeline =) and you might be right about the screens.
Depends which 3DS you have, I think the New/XL gets a little more mileage but a launch 3DS has a stated battery of 3-5 hours and Fire Emblem Awakening drains it in about that.
Metal Gear GZ had a cool thing where the idroid could be handled via your phone or an iPad so you didn't need to real time pause and could glance down at your lap for a real time map with tagged guard movement within a certain range. It was like having the solution radar again but because you had to look at a different screen yourself working with how gz works, it was fucking perfect and it's such a bummer phantom pain didn't use it. Having the cassette tapes play from a different speaker was way better too. I have no idea why phantom pain didn't use it cause it made the experience SOOO much better and had that metal gear meta, instead of snake pulling put his phone to call in the helicopter you do it on your irl phone and the TV screen stays in gameplay mode, it's also cooler to drop you phone on your lap and scramble for.the controller when you spot a guard on the TV while looking back and fourth between thst and the menu on your phone instead of a no pause pause menu. Other games could do this and should, it works.
I have been saying for years that dual screen (or asymetric screens. can't really remember the name) was one of the best ideas in gaming that got fully abandonned no clue why. there are just a few games outside the ds line that actually did that and they were great (GZ did great. wiiu having two screens by default did not use it as much as it should). the DS games having usualy the map or sometimes inventory management on the secondary screen was simply great. many games would totally benefit from that
Wonder if it's some patent bullshit like the loading screen minigames?
i think is more likely to be a "mainstream gamers do not like this" line of thought, like with motion controllers. DS and 3DS did really well, but they had always the "casual" label (analogue to the wii and motion controllers) so "mainstream gamers" stayed away from them. even with the wiiu, that had native dual screens, nintendo tried to cater to a "mainstream gamers" audience and there are too few games that actually uses the dual screen effectively.
there might be more to this, like casual audiences moving to mobile games and only "gamers" buying consoles, but i'm not educated enough in the topic to make a judgement there.
tangentially, but
loading minigames patent
what the fuck is this??? how did someone actually accepted this?? how did I not hear about it before? this is silly on so many levels. like, patentings characters jumping or so (don't doubt something like this exist, but also don't want to know)
Have you considered that maybe everyone is wearing jncos again so pockets are bigger?
I made myself 18th century detached pockets, and you can modernise their side tying skirts and wear the pockets on the inside. Pocket your wine bottle, pocket your cat!
That sounds like a lot of work when you can just steal a fanny pack from kohls
Yeah but now I look pretty and can shoplift at levels trenchcoats can only dream of.
And you can put your pocket melons in them!
https://www.tradewindsfruit.com/content/queen-anne-melon.htm
most dildos are not that long...!
Uhhh volcel police? We've got another one here
I wanted g*mers to have to consider the absolute length of the hardware they're handling, you know?And the girth??? Handhelds can be long and thin or short and bulky!
- Show
The VOLCEL POLICE are on the scene! PLEASE KEEP YOUR VITAL ESSENCES TO YOURSELVES AT ALL TIMES.
نحن شرطة VolCel.بناءا على تعليمات الهيئة لترويج لألعاب الفيديو و النهي عن الجنس نرجوا الإبتعاد عن أي أفكار جنسية و الحفاظ على حيواناتكم المنويَّة حتى يوم الحساب. اتقوا الله، إنك لا تراه لكنه يراك.
people started to demand console game experiences on handheld for the most part.
comoanies decided they wanted to close the gap more, to avoid the situation square enix had with DQ11 (where they basically designed the game side by side with the PS4 version)
handhelds with it got both bigger, and required active cooling, which is part of the reason it got bigger.
demand console game experiences on handheld
I lol/lmao at this assertion because for all the size-queening, the Steam Deck has long since fallen behind intensive games. I do sympathise with wanting the same games on the go and portable, though.
more or less depended on what you wanted to play. For example, Elden Ring being playable was quite huge. BG3 outside of the hiccups in chapter 3 is playable. those kind of experiences basically would have never happened on older devices on game launch.
I don't inherently disagree with the portable PC thing, but lol @ one of the games you cite becoming unplayable partway through. I just feel like these devices are huge without much in exchange...
For smartphones I think a significant driver of their ever-increasing sizes is that battery technology is lagging behind power demand. The worst thing of having a small phone these days is that the battery lasts less than a day. Big screens used to be too power hungry to be practical but LEDs are extremely efficient these days.
My prediction is that we'll return to the miniaturization craze of the 1990s whenever the next breakthrough in battery technology happens.
I will say power demand is at least partly driven by constantly on tracking and advertising. Most of what I actually do on the phone could be done with an irc channel and text-only Web browser
Real, I guess battery tech hasn't moved a lot in ten years...
I want to retvrn to small stuff honestly...
Battery tech has improved a lot, but enough power for a mobile device is a moving target too.
As with the phallic-obsessive throughline of the post, the bigger the gear, the lazier and more incompetent you can be providing a serviceable ride. Anybody can build a gmer rig in an atx case. You can shit out a steamdeck without needing to order too many specialized parts or actually figure out what you're doing, and gmers are by nd large hogs hooked on the easiest available dopamine supplying skinner box so it makes sense they'd give in to the thickness
I thought it was funny
I like this take though, it makes a lot of sense actually. Especially for stuff like the ROG Ally or Lenovo Whateveritis that have almost entirely generic parts...
If people need to scratch a gaming itch on the go, their smartphones will tide them over now. The new "portable" systems work best when you're settled in either at home or on the go and are pretty awkward in other contexts.
Mobile gaming is either smartphone games or retro systems/emulators at this point
Smartphones have no games, smartphone gaming is fake. They're only used for emulators too, but thr control setups are painful, be it weird clippable controllers or touch...
I don't mind the Ambernic/Powkiddy emusystems though. I could play PS1 games forever.
You seen this thing? First smartphone add on controller I've seen that looks like something that could actually plausibly be carried around.
I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:
Personally I just care way more about performance than size. Power of a computer part generally correlates to size, and the smaller a form factor you cram those parts into the harder it is to manage the thermals. So I'd much rather have a bigger thing that works better than a smaller thing that sucks
I think this is probably the reason why Deck Beeg, and it makes sense, but I also don't see why we can't have cheaper 7" devices with those 5-watt Athlon Gold APUs...
