• came_apart_at_Kmart [he/him, comrade/them]
    ·
    edit-2
    4 months ago

    as classy as that ring would be on my pinky, jewelry is a no go for me: too awkward and clumsy. I prefer to keep my boner pills in a false tooth I can bite down on like a captured assassin.

    "Who are you? Who hired you?"
    "Suck off one head and two more will take it's place. Hail Viagra!"
    [bites tooth and laughs]

  • propter_hog [any, any]
    ·
    4 months ago

    as the Soviets take Berlin

    In their head they were on the side of the Nazis and needing to take a suicide pill?

  • SpiderFarmer [he/him]
    ·
    4 months ago

    I once had a poison ring. The clasp was weak, so it was always popping open at random points.

    • crime [she/her, any]
      ·
      4 months ago

      That's good setup for a funny bit or a murder mystery twist. Chekhov's faulty poison ring clasp

      • propter_hog [any, any]
        ·
        4 months ago

        So I'm fingering my partner, right? But my suicide ring has this faulty clasp, and for whatever reason I forgot to take it off before sexy time. Anyway, bada bing bada boom, I've got a life insurance claim.

  • D61 [any]
    ·
    4 months ago

    Falling asleep with the dog sleeping on the floor and waking up as its drilling a hole in my leg after having licked my hand trying to wake me up to let him outside...

  • Absolute@lemmygrad.ml
    ·
    4 months ago

    Damn now I need some pill rings what the hell, been keeping my pills in bottles or bags like a loser with no swag