her,,, expolde
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sex
Somewhat relatedly, another thing romance novels have helped me is the concern that I’ve gaslit myself into thinking I liked men because they make me feel more feminine in contrast. As it turns out, cishet women also find that appealing
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Okay wait this one is new to me, real?
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Yep, it’s pretty common actually. It turns out that gender validation is just all-round an important part of sex and intimacy for cis people as well as trans people
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Hmmmm... I suppose as long as it's not the only thing attracting someone to men it's cool and good? I usually see it as 'weh I don't like men BUT' so I'm biased. Makes sense tho.
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Yeah I think it usually just plays a role in preferring masc men or is kind of a nice bonus to already being into men, but it’s always been an anxiety of mine that the only reason I like men is gender validation (and it kind of still is tbh) so seeing that cishet women can also get gender validation from being with men and still genuinely like men was reassuring
That said I’m still not convinced heterosexuality isn’t just a massive oppositional-sexism-based scheme for gender validation
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Yeah that is really cool, I like that. Big fan of this discovery tbh!!