Good evening. Monday evening.
Welcome to another week in hellworld. How is everyone doing? How was your week?
I'm in grad school to be a therapist. Doing practicum over zoom, working from home. Doing OK personally but my gf is struggling with online classes and also work from home. Always feel like I have to keep it together for everyone--i can and am able to but fuck sometimes I need some sad boi alone time.
Mostly worried about noncovid stuff. My internship coming up is 900 hours of unpaid labor (actually paying thousands for the opportunity lol). Sick of #thegrind. Just wanna help people and not have to budget every fucking cent. Stimulus check 2 please?
Staying optimistic, grounded, and proud of myself. Still, I'm 26 and feel 40. Expecting a dark future (big picture) and trying to find meaning in increasingly absurd times.
Hope you get the sad boi alone time you need. You're doing a good thing. Hope things get better for your gf as well.
I have new medication for my mental health issues, Im feeling as good as ever, what about you?
Thanks for asking, comrade! Honestly I'm not doing well. My mental health was garbage last week. Just a lot of uncertainty about my job, apartment and relationship. I get stressed out by uncertainty, I like routines and living a simple life.
Great to hear that your medication is working well! I know it's hard to find the one that works for you. I tried a few before I settled on Lexapro.
I thought I was on a mental health upswing, but it turns out it was just dissociation. I kinda thought it might be, because I didn't feel like the same person and I wasn't having emotions and I started to believe that I didn't have CPTSD and that I was never traumatized at all. I guess my brain just did that to deal with the stress of my celiac diagnosis, and it worked, I did all the things that needed to be done and felt just fine. But the last week has been one big crash for my nervous system. Nightmares and pain are both bad again.
Sorry to hear you had a bad week! Mine was shit as well. I had really bad dissociation at some point in life and for me it was worse than depression. I hope this week is better for you! :heart-sickle:
For half my life I felt scared and depressed, now I just feel nothing anymore. I'm just getting older and older and time keeps passing by. I don't have purpose or something idfk. I suck at expressing myself. I feel everything is in vain in this world. It's all destined to fall apart and die out. What's the fucking point of all of this shit?
th the tt... we have a responsibility, we take an oath, to protect and defend our chapo dot chat health and wellness
I've been on HRT for 5 months now and my emotions are like ten times stronger. I saw a meme with the Guts theme and I almost cried myself to sleep that night.
I'm going to try meditating more often. I hadn't done it in years, and I really felt like I'd lost that ability to look inside and find a place of calm. Felt like something was missing. But when I actually went through the motions - turned off all distractions, sat down, took a few deep breaths, put my hands in my lap - once I went through the ritual and tried to look inside myself - I realized it was there all along, and just sitting for a few minutes being aware of and accepting everything I was feeling made me feel so much better and so much more in control. Haven't felt that good in a while.
Meditation rules. Try to do it every day at the same time, that helps with making it stick. I meditate every day after lunch for around 15 minutes.
Oof. I can't imagine not sleeping. It's the only thing I'm looking forward to on shitty days. I'm wishing you good and comfy sleeps. :heart-sickle:
Yeeting yourself because of a phone bill is not very cash money. At least wait for the revolution so you can take a few billionaires with you!
Week two of being cut off by my one shitty source for pot. Starting to quietly freak out. Feels like I'm choking on anxiety. Drinking doesn't take the edge off. I hate this country, I hate this fucking state.
