You will never be a real Chad. You have no chin, you have no wrists, you have no sex. You are an incel twisted by steroids and improper lifting form into a crude mockery of nature’s perfection. All the “sex” you get is two-faced and half-hearted. Behind your back people mock you. Your parents are disgusted and ashamed of you, your “friends” laugh at your recessed jaw behind closed doors. Chads are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of years of evolution have allowed Chads to sniff out frauds with incredible efficiency. Even dweebs who “pass” look uncanny and unnatural to a Chad. Your bone structure is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a drunk girl home with you, she’ll turn tail and bolt the second she gets a whiff of your adolescent, stagnant axe body spray. You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake smile every single morning and tell yourself it’s going to be ok, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight. Eventually it’ll be too much to bear - you’ll buy a bench, pump some iron, not use a spotter, and drop the bar on your own throat. Your parents will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They’ll bury you with a headstone marked with your Reddit posts, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know a nerd is buried there. Your body will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a skeleton that is unmistakably weak. This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.

:le-pol-face: