"Biden Administration looks for 'fresh start' after lackluster 100 days"

"Biden condemns violence of riots 'on both sides' after lastest fatal shootings"

"Hottest August on record"

"Nation mourns as covid-19 deaths hit 500,000"

"Stock market reaches record levels"

"Inspiring homeless nurse still manages to treat COVID19 patient, as new record of daily cases hits California"

"Former Presidents meet at Mar-a-Lago for photo shoot"

Shit isn't hard. Hire me The Onion.

  • Jorick [he/him]
    ·
    edit-2
    4 years ago

    "Simply unseen since the Great Depression : the stock market loses 95% of its value"

    "Over 1M Covid deaths in the US, vaccinations failed after millions of doses expired"

    "We lost everything : how did the pandemic pushed millions of Americans into homelessness"

    "Forest fires ravage Africa, Australia and the Americas, killing billions of animals"

    "India and Pakistan officially at war", 2 weeks later "CONFIRMED : Nuclear detonations in both Pakistan and India; UN security council emergency meeting to take place"

    "Far-right group claims both attacks in DC and Seattle"

    "15% of Yemen's population died of starvation"

    "A modern plague : suicides see an unprecendented rise in US, Europe."

    "Over 3 billions Covid masks to be in the oceans by 2022."

    "French presidential polls see Le Pen at 50% voting intentions"

    Yes, I am a fun guy at parties.

    • Not_irony [he/him]
      hexagon
      ·
      4 years ago

      Yes, I am a fun guy at parties.

      I know the feeling. Been saying 2021 is gonna be worse than 2020 for months.

    • shashasha [he/him]
      ·
      4 years ago

      Hey, it might not be lepen, good chance we get an ex general instead :^)

      Fucking end me

    • rozako [she/her]
      ·
      4 years ago

      Didn't even think about the disposable masks waste before now