"Biden Administration looks for 'fresh start' after lackluster 100 days"

"Biden condemns violence of riots 'on both sides' after lastest fatal shootings"

"Hottest August on record"

"Nation mourns as covid-19 deaths hit 500,000"

"Stock market reaches record levels"

"Inspiring homeless nurse still manages to treat COVID19 patient, as new record of daily cases hits California"

"Former Presidents meet at Mar-a-Lago for photo shoot"

Shit isn't hard. Hire me The Onion.

  • axont [she/her, comrade/them]
    ·
    edit-2
    4 years ago

    Family says the child was regularly involved in local church bake sales and had all A's on his last report card.

    meanwhile

    Suspected criminal black man died in a police related kinetic shooting engagement for holding a particularly gun-shaped licorice stick in a threatening manner. Chief of police says "Look, the public needs to know that our officers are trained to react to a dangerous situation. The officer feared for his life." The suspect was revealed yesterday to have a storied criminal past with such heinous crimes as marijuana possession and speeding.

    • Not_irony [he/him]
      hexagon
      ·
      4 years ago

      The officer feared for his life.”

      Cops do be telling on themselves; a buncha racist, cowards, or racist cowards