Everyone knows how rabidly reactionary and shitheaded the SW fandom became after the Disney acquisition but I'm finally at my breaking point with this latest wave of chud whining. The Acolyte got review bombed before it even aired because the showrunner is a lesbian and the leading actress is a gay enby. Also a clip of Stenberg from like 6 years ago made the rounds where she says the goal of a completely different project she was working on was to make white men cry and chuds who get all their news from youtubers thought she was talking about the Acolyte.

Fast forward to the show's release, the chuds continue to whine about woke Star Wars despite the show's first several episodes being pretty bland and mid in every regard. To disguise their actual reasons for hating the show (diverse cast and queer showrunner) they pull out the absolute most ridiculous reasons to bash it, including but not limited to:

  • "The writing is awful and the story sucks!" (the dialogue is genuinely quite bad at times but no worse than 95% of star wars projects. The general story is a mystery-thriller that's compelling enough. Also these same people turn around and say the prequels are incredible so funny-clown-hammer)

  • "The show contracts and ruins the prequels!" alright time to put on my nerd cap because the media literacy of these fucking shitbags is nonexistent. "Dark side user" =/= Sith, Red-lightsaber-user =/= Sith, there are tons of darkside users in the galaxy but the Sith area very specific order that the jedi warred with for thousands of years before they were almost completely wiped out. Also half the point of the prequels was to show the Jedi are blinded by their hubris and waning connection to the force, the Sith were right under their nose the entire time and they were just too arrogant to see it, silly Darth Teeth man doesn't ruin shit in your dog ass shit fuck childrens movies.

  • "The show RETCONS CANON in an UNACCEPTABLE WAY" this is because a prequel side character's DOB was retconned and he's a lot older now and appears in the show. These worthless fucks are sending death threats to Wookiepedia editors who change the character's DOB and screaming that it's vile yes that's right it's VILE to change a fictional background character's birthday. Just take a look at the replies on that post, yes I know it's the bird hellsite filled with ragebait but the responses like "oh well I thought that GATEKEEPING was a BAD THING nerd" are just so bleak. Art and media mean nothing to these people, their hobby is not watching Star Wars, its watching ragebait youtubers and getting violently angry about mundane things in shows they've never watched and aren't interested in democracy-manifest Also these screaming manbabies keep referencing non-canon books and shit as "proof" of the show retconning things

The discourse around TLJ was bad but I think I'm finally done engaging with the SW fandom in any way shape or form. My brain has finally been broken by the chuds. I don't think I'll even tell people I like SW anymore because these shitbrains have just ruined it. And yes I know I need to touch-grass but if you don't spend a decent amount of time in these SW fandom circles I promise you don't know how bad it actually is

/rant

  • WhatDoYouMeanPodcast [comrade/them]
    ·
    10 days ago

    Every day that passes makes my proposal of a plotless lightsaber tournament that much more appealing by contrast.

    Fuck it! Anakin vs Luke, Quai Gon Jin vs Rei, Obi Wan vs Akosha, Darth Maul vs Yoda, Mace Windu vs General Greivis, Duku vs Palpetine

    And you know what? Sora from Kingdom Hearts vs Kylo Ren. Just send my Emmy in the mail

    • AssortedBiscuits [they/them]
      ·
      10 days ago

      Every day that passes makes my proposal of a plotless lightsaber podracing tournament that much more appealing by contrast.

      FTFY

      • ssj2marx@lemmy.ml
        ·
        9 days ago

        Yo that podracing scene fucks, you can really tell that George wanted to do a sci fi racing movie all along (there's a drag race through beggar's canyon in the original Star Wars treatment/script lmao).

            • ssj2marx@lemmy.ml
              ·
              9 days ago

              The movie opens with Sebulba racing on Corellia. He's in the middle of the pack, which the announcers call out as unusual, as he's on a 12 race winning streak. Sebulba gives a hand signal to the racer in front of him, who waves back, and the two begin drafting each other, breaking out of the pack and passing the leader.

              Going into the final turn, it seems that Sebulba's play worked perfectly, but that he's still going to get second place, breaking his winning streak. That is until he flashes his vents at the driver in front of him, blinding him during a critical part of the turn, allowing Sebulba to go to the inside track and ram the other driver, damaging one of his engines.

              Sebulba wins by a hair, and the crowd boo him. It's obvious that what he did was extremely illegal, but the announcers are in his corner, calling it "an unfortunate accident". After the race, Sebulba is interviewed and asked about the rumor that he participated in an unsanctioned race on a backwater planet owned by slave traders, a rumor which he denies.

              Cut to Ben Quadrinaros, who is watching this all play out on a monitor while washing dishes in a cantina. Ben is a member of a swoop gang and a legend on the small track, but he had to save up for years to rent the pod racer the blew up on him while he was on the starting line, and now his dreams of using the prize money to get off Tatooine are gone. That is, until a second chance in the form of a shady loan to buy another pod and enter another race comes his way...

              It'd totally work.

    • Dessa [she/her]
      ·
      9 days ago

      A lightsaber tourney would be amazing, but I wouldn't make it about a cast we already kniw.

      Fill it with martial artists and stunt workers. Theres no plot so no need for acting ability.

      But heres the hard part almost anybody in hollywood would fail at: Make the action 70-80% middle shots and keep the camera on the action through more than a single action beat. Keep the camera steady and let the dancers show off their skills.

      If they can't do this, then I'd rather the keep the soapy formula they've been on

      • WhatDoYouMeanPodcast [comrade/them]
        ·
        8 days ago

        That would be beautiful, but when it comes to star wars, I am such a sucker for magic-enhanced martial arts. I write about it because it's how my imagination has developed as I started doing BJJ, striking, etc. I need them to have choreography and LARPing in addition to their real skills. I need someone to be about to get sliced and force push their opponent back. I need someone to throw a giant rock and their opponent torpedos through it spinning saber first only to get force lightning-d out of the air. I need someone to demonstrate force choking not working against another force user to characterize Vader as a bully. They need to lose a saber and have to wrestle each other over the single lightsaber left. I NEED TWO YOUNG YODAS

        • Dessa [she/her]
          ·
          8 days ago

          Yes, naturally. What would be the point of making it star wars if it didnt have all that wacky force business?

          I feel like the Acolyte was advertised as a magic martial arts show, and it had me hyped, but so far there's just been the opening scene which is disappointing. Here's hoping we get more if that later because itherwise this show is super dull