I've been on E for almost 5 months now and one of the things I didn't expect from it is that wow, everything in the world is really pretty now! The sky looks nice! The trees are great! I never loved the changing colors of the fall leaves before but they're so much prettier than they were before? I need to spend more time in nature now, this is great! Is this something anyone else has ever felt?
you may have been suffering from derealization, its common among trans people. it makes everything look gray, blurry, and bad
Holy shit my nihilistic tendencies pre transition make so much sense now