I'm in too deep fellas, not sure they'd let me out scot-free. Thought I'd ask fellow operators.

  • buh [any]
    ·
    3 years ago

    Every day go to your boss(es) and say “this is the Central Intelligence Agency, how’d you get in?” then laugh menacingly

  • pooh [she/her, any]
    ·
    3 years ago

    Here’s what you do:

    1. Take peanut butter and Nutella and mix it together in a ziplock bag
    2. Tape the bag to your bare ass and put your clothes on over it
    3. Go into your boss’ office and ask to speak to them
    4. When they ask what’s up, squat down, clench, grunt, and act like you are shitting your pants
    5. Before they can ask what the hell you are doing, reach back into the bag you taped to your ass and grab a big handful of your mixture
    6. Put it in and around your mouth, and maybe smear it all over your face, body, etc.
    7. ????
    8. Enjoy your new-found freedom
  • Zoift [he/him]
    ·
    3 years ago

    Best case scenario: Get in contact with HR, say you're burnt out, ask for light duty in billing or the dog shooting range. After a few months you can do an internal transfer over to the NSA reviewing videos of people jacking it. You'll keep your 401K and you don't have to keep reifying your bloodoath.

  • dom [he/him]
    ·
    3 years ago

    Don't quit. Stop being productive and commit wage theft until they fire you

  • Mardoniush [she/her]
    ·
    3 years ago

    Have you tried loudly singing the Internationale at your desk?

  • QuillcrestFalconer [he/him]
    ·
    3 years ago

    Throw a goodbye gender reveal party at 1000 Colonial Farm Road, McLean, VA 22101, United States and make sure to invite all your colleagues