Heading out to go load gear soon, so I'll make this quick.

We're a 2 piece instrumental metal band, I like to call our genre "Cthulhu doomnoise." The guy who does my tattoos put us in touch with a bar owner who was trying to put together a metal show to benefit a friend of his who was in a motorcycle crash. Cool, we're in! Show is in 2 weeks, short notice, but whatever.

No fucking word from the venue owner until 2 nights ago, and now we're the ONLY metal band on the bill. Before us is a folk/jazz group, and then a party rock rent-a-band style group is doing 90 minutes before us. Nobody wants to bring their own gear, so everyone asked us for drums and amps. We got so fed up with waiting on show details from the owner that was said "fuck this." Owner has done 0 promo or anything, I can't even find websites for the other bands playing.

Now we're just gonna show up with 2 guitars, no drums, and play some Sunn style shit. OR, if the vibe is really bad around 1AM (when we're supposed to go on), we'll just plug our pedal boards into the drummer's switch and play Mario Kart on stage and fuck with the noises from that and call it art.

Fun times.

Update: first band is on and they're a Chicago style blues band and I have no idea what we're doing here.

  • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]
    ·
    3 years ago

    OR, if the vibe is really bad around 1AM (when we’re supposed to go on), we’ll just plug our pedal boards into the drummer’s switch and play Mario Kart on stage and fuck with the noises from that and call it art.

    You seriously need to do this.

    • corgiwithalaptop [any, love/loves]
      hexagon
      ·
      3 years ago

      We did bring the cables he needs to make that happen (he's a huge sound equipment/experimental guy) so we're gonna feel it out and see. We did load our gear in, what little of it we brought. The venue also has some 1960s style chairs in front of a 1950s style TV we are talking about playing the set at. Just put our pedal boards in front of the chairs and play our set sitting in front of the TV.

      • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]
        ·
        3 years ago

        Nice, sounds to me like you can make a good night of it.

        On another note, I just got home from playing a show with my hardcore band tonight, and there was a guy in the crowd wearing a Kim Jong Un t-shirt lmao

        • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
          ·
          3 years ago

          First local indoor punk show since covid is on the 20th! First great one is new years in my living room!

            • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
              ·
              3 years ago

              We have a bunch of bands that wanna come out here that fucking rule. Dunno how much you know about Canada crust but Janicki who used to sing in After the Bombs and Parasytes, ran Katakombs and did Varning fest in MTL loves our town and has gotten into the habit of sending bands east. We're on the coast so it's at least a 10 hour drive back before there's anything to play again but I guess we're worth it.

              • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]
                ·
                3 years ago

                I know little to nothing about the canadian crust scene tbh. I have a Saccage album, if that counts lol

                • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
                  ·
                  3 years ago

                  After the Bombs are fairly well known/well distributed and Parasytes were at least north america trendy for a bit so I thought you may have known the..

                    • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
                      ·
                      3 years ago

                      Definitely do. Here's my hometown favorite.

                      https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=LNf6xg7fpxc

                      Napalm Raid and System Shit are from here and also got decently known. Decontrol from Winnipeg are one of the best dbeat bands ever. They tried to your, made it to Montreal, got hooked on dope there and lived in a van behind the venue for 10 years after. Their album In Trenches rips hard. Inepsy was huge but Im not into the motorcrust thing, but they were pioneers for that. BC has a huge anarchist black metal/blackened crust scene started with Black Kronstadt and Iskra. Leper and Mutiny are sweet bands from that scene as well. The prairies are all about Mincecore. SixBrewBantha and Aragothles are sick. Massgrave are also from Canada.

                          • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]
                            ·
                            3 years ago

                            In my defense though, one of my all time fav bands of any genre is Voivod, and I've always known they're canadian lol

                            • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
                              ·
                              3 years ago

                              Our entire Strat as a nation is to just kinda get lost in the noise that is America and go unnoticed, so it comes with the literal territory.

                                • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
                                  ·
                                  edit-2
                                  3 years ago

                                  Oh, Blasphemy is from here, so we are responsible for War Metal. I'm deeply sorry about that.

                                      • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]
                                        ·
                                        3 years ago

                                        Oy yeah, De Mysteriis Dom Satanas is a masterpiece. Just an amazing album.

                                        I actually grew up with one of their current guitarists, and played in some bands with him over the years. I think he basically writes all their material at this point. "Teloch" I think he calls himself.

                                        • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
                                          ·
                                          3 years ago

                                          Isn't the drummer the only OG member and also very much a nazi? I'll enjoy never giving them money and sometimes listening to Deathcrush but id never associate with anyone involved with the band.

                                          • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]
                                            ·
                                            3 years ago

                                            Drummer and bassist are OG. Drummer has custom cymbals with "white power" printed on them, so yeah.

                                            About ten or so years ago, I was a live session bassist for a band called Nidingr, and the Mayhem drummer played on an EP they released, so I did two or three gigs with him. I got the impression that he was pretty much just an edgelord who never grew the fuck up because of getting famous-ish at such a young age. I don't think he really believes in anything at all, it's all just shock value. He's older than me, but I pretty much saw him as a child.

                                            • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
                                              ·
                                              edit-2
                                              3 years ago

                                              With custom made 'white power' symbols...I dunno. We let fucking Conflict know they weren't welcome in Canada for having an anti Muslim immigration song from 2003 and other generally dodgy shit. I can't imagine letting something like that fly

                                              • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]
                                                ·
                                                3 years ago

                                                Oh yeah, just a totally normal and cool thing to do. The guy got reddit brain before reddit even existed lmao

                                                • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
                                                  ·
                                                  3 years ago

                                                  I just added an edit. That's nuts toe that shit would fly at all. We're PC as all fuck

                                                  • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]
                                                    ·
                                                    3 years ago

                                                    I was nowhere near as politically aware back then as I am know, but it really didn't sit right with me.

                                                    There's no fucking way I'd share a stage with him today.

                                                    • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
                                                      ·
                                                      3 years ago

                                                      Didn't mean it as a personal judgement at all, just that he'd even be allowed on a stage without getting a beatdown is weird. Metal is different too

                                                      • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]
                                                        ·
                                                        3 years ago

                                                        Didn’t mean it as a personal judgement at all

                                                        Did not take it as that, no worries

                                                        Metal is different too

                                                        It definitely is, yeah. I love the music, but the older I get the more disillusioned I get about the scene.

                                  • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]
                                    ·
                                    3 years ago

                                    Oh, and here's a cool norwegian band you should check out btw, Summon The Crows

                                    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xi9PHOOEv6k

                        • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
                          ·
                          3 years ago

                          Also gotta ask which bands? If they're people I know they may be happy to hear they're known overseas

                          • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]
                            ·
                            3 years ago

                            I've def heard Napalm Raid, Inepsy, and Iskra. And somewhat certain I've heard Massgrave.

                            • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
                              ·
                              edit-2
                              3 years ago

                              Massgrave is Disrupt kinda crust and they have a split with Stormcrow. Napalm Raid's first show was opening for my first band. The guitarist and bassist live across the country now, the drummer still lives here and just had a kid.

              • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]
                ·
                3 years ago

                I've already posted links to it on here out in the open before, so I don't mind doing it again

                https://ddsdmt.bandcamp.com/

                • corgiwithalaptop [any, love/loves]
                  hexagon
                  ·
                  3 years ago

                  Right on, cheers! Here's my doom band:

                  https://plagueofcarcosa.bandcamp.com/album/ocean-is-more-ancient-than-the-mountains

                  Yeah the first band playing at this show tonight is a chicago style blues band and I dont know why we're fucking here. Ill check your stuff out when I get home tonight.

                  • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]
                    ·
                    3 years ago

                    Oh right, I've think I've checked you guys out before actually, good stuff

                    I'm also in a stoner/doom/psych thing:

                    https://jointhugger.bandcamp.com/

                    • corgiwithalaptop [any, love/loves]
                      hexagon
                      ·
                      3 years ago

                      Oh shit I think I've heard yall before! I'll listen again when im home from the show but the name is for sure familiar.

      • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
        ·
        3 years ago

        We had a band where one of our guitarists didn't know how to play in the real sense and just made noise, he couldn't make it so we just leaned a guitar against an amp and let it feed back. People love shit like that.

  • emizeko [they/them]
    ·
    edit-2
    3 years ago

    there was someone commenting on here who plays bagpipes for cash

    • john_browns_beard [he/him, comrade/them]
      ·
      edit-2
      3 years ago

      It me

      I don't really have too many horror stories, mostly people don't know what they actually want and you have to explain why playing bagpipes in a bar or restaurant for an hour straight without breaks is a terrible idea, even on St. Patrick's Day.

      For weddings and parties there is a very fine line between playing for too little time and too much time, it usually goes from "that was fun" to "holy fuck make it stop" in one tune. You have to read the crowd and get out of there while they are still enjoying it.

      The worst gig I've ever done was a traditional Indian wedding where the family wanted a pipe band for some reason. The entire crowd of like 200 people was emotionless the entire time. Not bored or anything, they just stared for fifteen minutes while we played. I tried walking around and dancing a bit while playing to get them into it, which made it even more awkward.

  • sadchip [he/him]
    ·
    3 years ago

    Hell yeah hit them with Sunn shit. Just make sure you wear long black robes.

  • corgiwithalaptop [any, love/loves]
    hexagon
    ·
    3 years ago

    Final update if anyone is chronicaling my night - we did our set on stage sitting in some old lady chairs and literally everyone left the bar. I didn't play my guitar 80% of the time I was up there and let my pedals do the lifting. I'd call it a success. The owner asked me to help him book metal shows once a month from spring until summer and I said "lol fuck no" and we killed his business for the remainder of the evening.

  • GrouchyGrouse [he/him]
    ·
    3 years ago

    No stories from the performance side of things, but I did see a wild show from a 2 piece band that referred to themselves as "yet another shithouse two piece band" and they killed it. Good luck to you!

  • PaulSmackage [he/him, comrade/them]
    ·
    3 years ago

    Played in a country punk band. Played at a friends bonfire for free because we had nothing else to do, and we got free food and beer. Wanted to play our regular set, but kept getting yelled at by guys drinking coors to play jason aldean and shit because "we're a country band".

    • corgiwithalaptop [any, love/loves]
      hexagon
      ·
      3 years ago

      Sounds par for the course. My punk band used to do Wagon Wheel (this was like 12 years ago when I only knew that song cause Laura Jane Grace did a cover) and we got thrown out of a few house parties cause we didn't have any other shit like that.

      • PaulSmackage [he/him, comrade/them]
        ·
        3 years ago

        Yeah, my big inspiration back then was Social Distortion (still is, tbh. Wear a lot of western shirts). So we'd have a backlog of classic country, but everyone in the crowd got annoyed because they didnt know the songs. We ended up getting bored, and just finished with Freebird, because we knew the joke and prepared it for every show we did.

    • corgiwithalaptop [any, love/loves]
      hexagon
      ·
      3 years ago

      Fuck I know thats a common thing and I can't think of the fix now either. Been there. Played in a drunk punk band all through college.

  • Nounverb [none/use name]
    ·
    3 years ago

    I despise every single trash DJ and band for rolling up onto my stages and sets, dumping a load of backline and gear on me last minute, not helping with the install, and then rolling out of the there paid and manifesting.

    So much so I'm buying shitty traktors, ripping 480p tracks off YouTube, and calling myself DJ Nounverb. Hooked on Phonics birches

  • threshold [he/him]
    ·
    3 years ago

    Not bad, but I busked with piano, and a cool girl watched me for a bit and then gave me $50 and left which above and away the most I'd received in one go. I know i'm not handsome as, but chased after her asking if she meant to give it, and she said yeah. She left. I still wonder if I could've gotten anywhere with that, or if she is just rich and enjoyed my music. Baffling

  • inshallah2 [none/use name]
    ·
    3 years ago

    The guy who does my tattoos put us in touch with a bar owner who was trying to put together a metal show to benefit a friend of his who was in a motorcycle crash.

    I'd like to hear that as a song.

  • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
    ·
    3 years ago

    You're playing doom. Being prepared really doesn't matter. Drums would be nice though.