There is a small room with passages to the EAST and SOUTH and a forbidding hole leading WEST. Bloodstains and deep scratches (possibly made by an axe) mar the walls. A nasty-looking troll, brandishing a bloody axe, blocks all the passages out of the room. Your sword has begun to glow very brightly.
What do you do?>
A dark fog envelops your body, and when the fog lifts, you are no longer there.
I say "hello friend, are you okay? Did you cut yourself?"
(I am also a nasty-looking troll)
Strike POSE
Boast NASTY-LOOKING TROLL
“ Ho there friend. I am Maj the Magnificent: Slayer of harpies, Savior of Shropshire, the only woman alive to best Lord Fauntleroy in a fair and open fight.”
Grin NASTY-LOOKING TROLL
Question NASTY-LOOKING TROLL
“What brings a fine fellow like you to a place like this?’
You hear some some drum loops start playing. The troll starts dancing leaving the EAST exit possibly unblocked. Your sword begins slowly flashes, the glow changing colors.
An elf pops out of the forbidden hole and says "And you have my bow"
The troll is very confused. The elf is decapitated, his bow and quiver drop on the ground. A dark fog envelops the elf's body, when the fog lifts, the corpse is gone.
Speaking to the troll: Fog demon pretending to be an elf. Saw them all the time while in the service
Gestures towards my chest covered in medals
In confusion and exasperation, the Troll throws down his axe and just walks off through the EAST passageway.
I take the axe and yell my logical explaination down the hall:
"My sword has been glowing ever since I got here and everything I kill with not turns into fog! The sword clearly detects fog monsters! You seem cool though! You might wanna keep your axe though! Fog monsters are no joke!"
I toss the axe westward and take a look at this hole.
The hole looks forbidding, the passageway meanders off and it is impossible to tell where it goes.
I'll chill by the hole and see if I hear back from the troll. I could use a hand against these fog monsters.
A seedy-looking individual with a large bag just wandered through the room. On the way through, he quietly abstracted some valuables from the room and from your possession, mumbling something about "Doing unto others before..."
The axe is no longer in the room and you realize that the painting is no longer in your inventory.
The painting you found two rooms previously. A painting of surpassing beauty, showing a pig with fecal matter on its gonads.
No, it was in the underground gallery SOUTH of the Troll Room. The only painting not looted by past adventurers.
Okay. I tell the weird guy that I don't mind him taking the painting but the troll might need that axe for whatever trolls need axes for, it's his axe anyway. I also ask him about this neat hole and if he knows the deal with it.
He shouts back something about how it's his axe now and you clearly not understanding the premise of a thief. he continues muttering curses until out of earshot.
Although I'm tempted to hang out in this room and see who else comes by, I totally understand the troll now btw, interesting dudes come by here. I figure it's time to see what down that hole. I do a comedic loony tunes style dive in.
You are in a cave with weird engravings. You can continue WEST or return EAST.
There is a room with a mirror on the SOUTH wall. There are exits WEST, NORTH and EAST.
It is 10 feet tall and takes up nearly the entire wall. You see yourself in the mirror and the rocky surroundings. You realize that you probably need a shower.
You eventually emerge on the surface world. You take a shower and return to your job at the Amazon warehouse.
A demon appears in front of you, summoned by your immoral, satanic music.
You and the demon dance until the album finishes. You are in an empty room now. The door out of the room is to the EAST.
Behind the Walls of Sleep is a song you phillistine, not an album. I east it up
You enter your living room. It is quite messy, there are empty pizza boxes and dirty dishes strewn all over, some fungus is growing in the corner. There is a leprechaun standing on your living room table.
I get mad at my roomates. I've been working for the last five days and haven't been in the living room. The leprechaun can wait.
The troll starts admonishing you for appropriation of Jamaican culture.
The troll says "It is not my job to teach you, but since you didn't waste it all on your sword, I will use your seasonings for some jerk chicken." The troll then swings his axe at you, grazing your arm.
The troll dodges you blow. He winds you with a blow from his axe handle.
It says the troll's blocking the "passages" though, not blocking the "hole" :rage-cry:
You and the troll start smoking that Alien OG Kush. You realize that the troll is actually and E1 orc and is part of the Branson clan. He says to watch out for the Biden with three heads deeper in the dungeon before wandering off in what he thinks is the direction of Terre Haute, IN
I speak to the sword some more, i ask it questions about where i am
The sword does nothing. The troll just continues to gawk at you, obviously uncertain how to react.
The troll does not respond. The troll just stares at you with wide eyes.
I speak to the sword some more, trying to get a reaction from the troll
You feel restrained by an unseen force. You look down a few seconds later and see a straight jacket. The troll looks slightly sad as you are dragged off into the darkness.
At some point in the darkness you lose consciousness. You wake up in a padded room.
you begin chewing some of the padding that you can get in your mouth.
I try to make myself look as big as possible by standing on the tips of my toes and holding my hands above my head. This technique works for scaring off Jehovah's witnesses so I might as well give it a bash here.
