DUDE i just LOVE the hustle and bustle of the big city, it’s so DYNAMIC and makes me feel like i’m in one of my favorite TV SHOWS. you should totally come on down to my studio apartment, it’s got EXPOSED RED BRICK walls and everything, we can crack open a nice hoppy ipa or three and get crazy watching some cartoons on adult swim! and dude, dude, DUDE, we have GOTTA go down to the barcade- listen here, right, it’s a BAR where us ADULTS who do ADULTING can go DRINK. BUT!!! it’s also an ARCADE like when we were kids, so we can play awesome VIDEO GAMES, without dumb kids bothering us. speaking of which megan and i have finally decided to tie the knot- literally -we’re both getting snipped tomorrow at the hospital, that way we can save money to spent more on ourselves and our FURBABIES. i’m fuckin JACKED man, i’m gonna SLAM this craft beer and pop open another one!!!

  • Crowtee_Robot [he/him]
    ·
    3 years ago

    I'm offended by how inoffensive that bit is. 2/10 because it did capture the essence of places like Denver, Austin and other similar locales though.

    • SorosFootSoldier [he/him, they/them]
      ·
      3 years ago

      Our pet wrecker is pretty funny because they've strawmaned posters on here into being trans city dwellers when our socioeconomic strata on hexbear is all over the place. But I forgot, leftism is only when you're trans and live in an urban area.

    • Leon_Grotsky [comrade/them]
      ·
      3 years ago

      Aside from the red brick flat this is like 65% of the people under 40 you run into on the north side of Chicago

    • jabrd [he/him]
      hexagon
      ·
      3 years ago

      As someone who lives in a city with a FIRE economy where you're not really sure what you export other than human misery, this feels painfully accurate

  • sammer510 [none/use name]
    ·
    3 years ago

    Okay but like. I'd get snipped tomorrow if I could. My partner wouldn't need to use birth control anymore. I don't see a downside. Idk why anyone would make fun of that.

    IPAs are bullshit though. Beer doesn't taste good and I'm tired of pretending that it does

    • SorosFootSoldier [he/him, they/them]
      ·
      3 years ago

      Okay but like. I’d get snipped tomorrow if I could. My partner wouldn’t need to use birth control anymore. I don’t see a downside. Idk why anyone would make fun of that.

      Because the default for h'wite people is making babies for the war machine.

    • ChestRockwell [comrade/them, any]
      ·
      edit-2
      3 years ago

      Got myself one so my partner wouldn't have to use birth control. I felt bad for her having all sorts of gnarly side effects. If you have insurance that covers it, it should be <$100. Should be free doe.

      Edit: IPA's are a young man's game. Used to love 'em, now I can't handle that shit.

  • CrimsonSage [any]
    ·
    edit-2
    3 years ago

    Like anyone under 50 can afford an apartment in the city without like 6 roommates.

    • GrouchyGrouse [he/him]
      ·
      3 years ago

      So the bed frame is bolted to the wall, twin mattress only. There's nine square feet in this corner if you want to do some yoga or whatever. $1200 and I need first and last month's rent along with a safety deposit.

        • GrouchyGrouse [he/him]
          ·
          edit-2
          3 years ago

          Three. You'll share the bed in six-hour allotments. Having the bed already warm from other bodies is a perk!

          • CrimsonSage [any]
            ·
            3 years ago

            This is so bleakly true. I live an hours drive from a major metro area, and rental/housing prices are insane. I make 25$ an hour and there literally isn't an apartment in the county that I could rent for myself that wouldn't leave me rent burdened. One of my coworkers pays ~50% in rent WITH low income housing assistance.

  • MsUltraViolet [she/her]
    ·
    3 years ago

    This is more accurate to check-mark PMC soyface libs than it is anyone here

    • HumanBehaviorByBjork [any, undecided]
      ·
      3 years ago

      they have some of the good parts of an arcade, but also the bad parts of a bar. if their business model wasn't based on overpriced drinks they'd be awesome.

      honestly what we oughta do is have a warehouse with a bunch of arcade machines. it's byob, there's a pile of straw in the corner with a dog sleeping on it.

      • Ithorian [comrade/them, null/void]
        ·
        3 years ago

        I managed to find one in a surprisingly rural area, they still had like ten taps all reasonably priced and every thing but pinball was free. But it was when I was camping out of state so never been able to go back.

        Any bar with a dog is instantly better.

    • UlyssesT [he/him]
      ·
      3 years ago

      I went to one once.

      It was loud. Far too loud.

      The dudebros there were more obnoxious than the kids at the old arcade. Unless they were the same kids at the old arcade but now having a midlife crisis.

    • MerryChristmas [any]
      ·
      3 years ago

      I love arcades and I hate barcades. I think I just hate bars in general.

  • mr_world [they/them]
    ·
    3 years ago

    Is this one of those things like "every leftist loves brutalism because they're ideologically required to do so" that very-online right-wingers do?

  • KollontaiWasRight [she/her,they/them]
    ·
    3 years ago

    This reads like someone turned a golden retriever into a hipster. Which would probably still be a better sitcom than like half of the ones currently on TV.

  • UlyssesT [he/him]
    ·
    edit-2
    3 years ago

    I LITERALLY LOVE all of U! EmojiEmojiEmoji like and subscribe and ring the bell

    Disclaimer: Not much of what the copypasta says is really that damning but influencer aesthetics are still :cringe: to me.