imagine being gay and still trying to conform to society's standards and shitting on superior rad fem gays

  • RedStarLesbian [she/her]
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    4 years ago

    I don’t act stereotypically gay either but I think it’s pretty obvious OP is talking about gay dudes who aggressively perform masculinity and deride feminine gays specifically appeal to straight, homophobic, sexist dudes. Not because they just naturally align with traditionally masculine traits. People like that definitely exist.

    • cracksmoke2020 [none/use name]
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      4 years ago

      If OP had meant that, then that's what they would've said. Instead they're implying that anyone who is gay and gender conforming is only that way because they're the thing your describing.

      I've seen people do this shit before, and it's gross and invalidating to huge numbers of gay people who also aren't in any way reactionary towards other gay people.

      • RedStarLesbian [she/her]
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        4 years ago

        I’m sorry if people have treated you like that before but everyone else here seems to have gotten the context of the post just fine. I get the impulse but there’s absolutely nothing in Cumwaffles post that’s specifically conflating masculine gays with the dudebro homophobic gays. She probably would have specified masculine gays if that’s what she meant.

          • RedStarLesbian [she/her]
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            4 years ago

            It’s the difference between “bros” and masculine guys in general. Maybe it isn’t really a thing outside of parts of the USA but “bro culture” is specifically referring to a highly performative, chuddy, jock-ish, and aggressively masculine group of guys. Think college frats. Gay Bros are just an extension of that.

            • cracksmoke2020 [none/use name]
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              4 years ago

              Yeah this is still where my discontent with the whole thing lies. You can be gay and be in a frat, and bring more feminine guys the frat events as dates, and defend them if members of your frat or other frats talk shit like I've done multiple times in the past.

              I gained a lot from being in a fraternity, although my experience is probably still different than others given that my frat was relatively leftist (powerful Bernie bro energy circa late 2015).

              • RedStarLesbian [she/her]
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                4 years ago

                I’m not talking about literally every frat and every person in one. It’s a stereotype that definitely exists. That’s what the Gay Bro thing is referencing from.

                • cracksmoke2020 [none/use name]
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                  4 years ago

                  Yeah I'm not angry at what you're saying, I'm just generally bothered that I get lumped in with shitty people when I'm just living as my authentic self.

                  • RedStarLesbian [she/her]
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                    4 years ago

                    That’s the thing comrade, I get the impulse but nobodies lumped you in anywhere here. Maybe making a separate post or clarifying that you know cumwaffle isn’t meaning to lump you into the Gay Bro archetype would be a bit more conducive to conversation since that is something that probably should be talked about in a more relevant context.

      • cumwaffle [she/her]
        hexagon
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        4 years ago

        i did indeed only mean the toxic assholes, i have nothing against masculinity, im sorry for upsetting you