imagine being gay and still trying to conform to society's standards and shitting on superior rad fem gays

  • RedStarLesbian [she/her]
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    4 years ago

    It’s the difference between “bros” and masculine guys in general. Maybe it isn’t really a thing outside of parts of the USA but “bro culture” is specifically referring to a highly performative, chuddy, jock-ish, and aggressively masculine group of guys. Think college frats. Gay Bros are just an extension of that.

    • cracksmoke2020 [none/use name]
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      4 years ago

      Yeah this is still where my discontent with the whole thing lies. You can be gay and be in a frat, and bring more feminine guys the frat events as dates, and defend them if members of your frat or other frats talk shit like I've done multiple times in the past.

      I gained a lot from being in a fraternity, although my experience is probably still different than others given that my frat was relatively leftist (powerful Bernie bro energy circa late 2015).

      • RedStarLesbian [she/her]
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        4 years ago

        I’m not talking about literally every frat and every person in one. It’s a stereotype that definitely exists. That’s what the Gay Bro thing is referencing from.

        • cracksmoke2020 [none/use name]
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          4 years ago

          Yeah I'm not angry at what you're saying, I'm just generally bothered that I get lumped in with shitty people when I'm just living as my authentic self.

          • RedStarLesbian [she/her]
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            4 years ago

            That’s the thing comrade, I get the impulse but nobodies lumped you in anywhere here. Maybe making a separate post or clarifying that you know cumwaffle isn’t meaning to lump you into the Gay Bro archetype would be a bit more conducive to conversation since that is something that probably should be talked about in a more relevant context.

            • cracksmoke2020 [none/use name]
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              4 years ago

              Yeah this space is relatively positive and affirming. But it's definitely a common trend I've come across among self identified rad queers to hate on gays that are in any way conforming. Although I assume in part that's largely just as a defense mechanism.

              • RedStarLesbian [she/her]
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                4 years ago

                Yeah, I know what you mean. I’m pretty stereotypically hetero looking and I’ve seen some of that bashing myself. There’s even the concept of “gold star lesbians”, which is what my name is referring to, where some gay women will disregard and consider women who have slept with men (or are more immersed in hetero culture) to be “lesser gays”. It’s definitely a thought pattern that exists.