- cross-posted to:
- chat
You must log in or register to comment.
No gods, no masters. You can be a contributing member of this group without being in charge. I know the feeling of not having a home, both physically and virtually, it sucks, but at this point there’s no reason to leave your virtual home. Shit, just make a new account and start over. You shouldn’t have been using the same account name on here anyway.
While I wish to express sympathy, part of your pain seems to come from losing your power and authority as a mod (I’m not trying to diminish your actual feelings, as I’m sure you’re also upset about losing a portion of your identity and you might also feel betrayed by a group you considered your lib family among other feelings to which I can only imagine what those may be and how they feel) I hope that shows you first hand what that power feels like and why that hierarchy needs to be checked.
No gods, no masters
So this isn't a safe space for trans communist witches?
Here are my thoughts. I hope hearing them can help.
Gender is complicated, and deeply ingrained in society. It’s normal to have hang ups and various *phobias. The important thing is that those phobias are acknowledged and worked through, instead of embraced. In that sense, what you did was fine—you had a particular hang up, and you acknowledged it and discussed it with likeminded people.
The problem is, you also had a position of authority in the community, which came with its own set of problems.
Firstly, words can—and will—be taken out of context. In doing so, they cease to be a person attempting to work through a hangup, and become a value statement.
The second is that even with context, it raises questions of whether those hang ups influence other decisions.
The solution is for authority figures to be held to a higher standard of conduct. The price of helping to run a shitposting, therapeutic community is that you don’t get to shitpost as hard or be as emotionally open.
In the long run, you’re better within the community than above it or detached from it. I don’t take your demodding as a mark against your character, but rather as a realignment of the relationship you have with people in the community.
That doesn’t mean that your efforts to date should be ignored. You stepped up, at short notice, to help manage a community. That deserves praise, regardless of the outcome, or whether you choose to remain here.
Absolutely.
You made a mistake. But it was a small mistake in the grand scheme of things. It's not like you admitted to being a pedo apologist or anything. I get why Beatnik made the call to demod you, but you're absolutely still welcome around here in my view. You're a good person who's been through some shit and made some mistakes, Rachel. And that's OK. We all make mistakes.
I'm the Ralphus weenie. Personally, I wouldn't have fired you, but it happened while I was asleep so I don't think I get a say in it. All I can tell you is talk to Beatnik about it.
And don't keep saying "tell me to fuck off". Your voice matters as much as anyone else's, you don't need to put yourself down all the time, and I don't want you to keep putting yourself down all the time.
Yeah, I’d like you back. Otherwise this place will just wind up full of stodgy MLs and armchair struggle sessions.
you should stay imo. I wasn't following all of this but Kia is right. As much as it must sting for this to happen, and I understand it probably stings extra hard coming at an already difficult time, you haven't been rejected. Probably feels like rejection right now but "realignment" is a good word. fwiw, every mod/admin is probably going to end up right where you are now at some point or another
Yeah. That’s normal, understandable, and valid. You were publicly called out, and stripped of a position. That‘ll sting in the best of scenarios.
It’s the role of people you’re close with to support you right now. If you feel the need to step back from the wider community, that’s valid. If you want to stay, that’s also valid. People will accommodate whatever you pick.
I absolutely agree with this.
I had written out a whole-ass post sort of defending you in the callout thread, but decided it wasn't my place to post it and people would get mad. Maybe that decision was made by the liberal in me. You're probably better off not being a volunteer online cop anyway.
Just make a new account. It's the great thing about online. New account, new person. Remake yourself into the person you want to be. Always be mindful, it's not always easy.
Growth hurts.
TBH, it's a little disconcerting you'd be punished in such a manner, when it seems like you're talking about personal experiences, inadvertently caused offense, and sincerely apologized. I mean, it's great that you're not kicked out of here entirely, but still, sometimes I feel like segments of the left could be a bit more forgiving. I guess that's just how it is - if you want to have authority in a leftist circle, you kind of need to be a robot. And use different accounts for posting and being a boss I guess?
I doubt you caused any lasting harm to anyone. Give it a few days, and if you decide you like it here, stick around, I doubt this is a burden you'll have to carry with you forever. I don't really know you at all, but you seem like a good person to me.
Nothing feels worse than accidentally upsetting someone you care about, and them holding it against you despite efforts to make it better. But the pain should fade with time. Take care of yourself.
use different accounts for posting and being a boss
you know, this is a good idea for a general policy. You have to let the mods/admins know what your alt is, but it would keep the drama down wrt "wow the mod has a personal opinion that I don't like, fuck them" blowback.
In the IT security world you use different accounts for different things. You don't use an privileged account for regular email.
I personally think she should be remodded. The offending messages don't in any way imply to me that she would be biased in her moderation of trans men or trans people in general, which as far as I can tell is what the demodding was justified with.
You'll be deeply missed on this site :( I'm looking forward to what comes of your discord/own podcast!
No. I will never, ever give a shit about online drama. This isn't a question of compassion
for some people online is really all they have. especially now, people are separated from family, coworkers, friends, everything. And it's tough. It's tougher on some people than others, but everyone deserves the support that they need.
it is a question of compassion. That you think it isn't only says something about you, not something about anyone else.
if you care this much about online, please, please reevaluate your life. it's not important at all and if you think it is you are, in the literal sense of the word, delusional
Invalidating people's support mechanisms when they might not have people offline to help them is cool and definitely revolutionary thinking:smiling face with sunglasses:
thinking online is anything other than a sinkhole for anti-establishment energy built to make revolution in real life more difficult is cool and definitely revolutionary thinking 😎
it doesn't matter what it means to ME... again, your attitude just says a lot about YOU.
How has it been less than a week and there's already been no fewer than two instances of mod drama
I didn't see what you said but I know you sincerely apologised and like you say you're not someone I would think would be actually transphobic.
If you would comfortable staying, that would be cool. I think you have important things to say and you can teach us a thing or two about life.
We need this space to be a diverse place with people from many backgrounds who have their own experiences and takes. We will definitely be losing something if you go. Either way, you're valid
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ikJony6h_tQ please don't go
